Corn2Cali

Office Faux Pas

2009-09-11T17:52:00.001-07:00

My friend, Reanna, sent this to me today and it totally cracked me up. For those of you who live in a cube on a daily basis, this edited excerpt will ring so true!

1. Don't! Be the Office Downer

You don't want to be such a buzz kill that people arrange their desks away from you.
That's what Caroline Melville, owner of virtual administrative service VirtuallySorted.com, had to do after hiring an accountant to work with her small team. In the mornings, when Melville asked how he was doing, he would respond with a deadpan, "I am not dead yet."

2. Don't! Microwave Fish in the Office

Tuna sandwiches are banned from some offices, but fish dishes in the microwave are absolutely off limits. "I never knew who the culprit was because the kitchen area was not near my desk," says Casey Corrigan, a media strategist at a New York City PR firm. The smell would waft through the office gently at first, and "then you would feel it more pungently." You don't want your cube mates wishing you would sleep with the fishes.

3. Don't! Go Barefoot

"Everybody wants to wear really cute shoes, and they go out and get five-inch tall Christian Louboutin shoes," reports a tipster who asked to remain anonymous because she feared she would lose her job for outing co-workers. "If you cannot walk in them, you should really go for a more sensible shoe." Resorting to kicking off your stilettos under the desk is permissible at the end of a long day, but "walking around the office barefoot is really gross."

4. Don't! Set Your Ring Tone to the Jonas Brothers

Keep your phone on vibrate. Your officemates notice your ring tone -- especially if it's particularly loud and annoying. "You would see five or six people who sat around her look at her and roll their eyes," says Richard O'Malley, remembering a former receptionist whose ring tone for her boyfriend was a Jonas Brothers song. At the sound of the boy-band melody, the woman would leave her desk to take the call. "It wound up working against her because everyone knew that she was slacking off," says O'Malley. "If you are the person who has the stupid cell phone ring, everyone has noticed it already. Turn it down."

5. Do! Save Smiley Faces for Mom

The owner of a small public relations agency, hired a recent college graduate to be her assistant and was confronted with an acute case of smiley face overload. They were on the picture frame, clock, mouse pad, screen saver and a decoy on the monitor. "The desk space itself was really dreadful," says Kerr. But it didn't end there: She also put smiley faces next to her initials and every single place she signed her name -- including the company's tax forms.

6. Don't! Be the Boss' New BFF

"People who are worried about being laid off end up going overboard to prove that they are indispensable, and that ends up making them seem so obnoxious to people," says Tina Lewis Rowe, a professional development coach.

7. Don't! Read Your Emails Out Loud

Keep a lid on it, neighbor. One wife complained -- on her husband's behalf -- about a coworker who reads her emails out loud. And listens to her voicemails on speakerphone. Seriously.
"My husband works right next (as in their desks are connected with no real divider, like Dwight and Jim on "The Office") to a woman who does all of her work, all day long, out loud," says the woman, who wanted to remain anonymous to protect her husband. Now her husband has to take any serious reading home and do it at night because he can't concentrate in the office.

8. Don't! Give Yourself a Mani/Pedi

"I had a boss who would clip his nails at his desk," says Michelle Poteet, who now owns Reclaim Order, a San Antonio-based life-organizing company. "The next position I was at, the guy across from me would clip his nails at his desk, and to me it is the worst sounding thing in the world."
"It would be one thing if you waited until there was background noise, but it always seemed to me that people, would do this when it was dead silence. Getting rid of a hang nail would be fine, but it is another thing if they are giving themselves a complete manicure." (Amen to that!!!)

9. Don't! Steal Food

Keep your mitts off other people's frozen lunches. One anonymous reporter out in the field says that her Lean Cuisines disappear from the freezer on a regular basis. "It has happened pretty much every where that I have worked," complains the office worker in distress. Not even writing her name in black Sharpie across the box deters thieves. So instead, the lunch lady keeps her thawing Lean Cuisine in her desk. Yum.

10. Don't! Crank the Russian Folk Music

Headphones, people. There is no faster way to top "cube rube" status than to crank your music.
You may think that you are all by your lonesome in your cube, but don't forget about your proximity to others. And if the spirit moves you, and you must have a bit of your motherland's music to get you through your day, headphones, people. Headphones.

A Time For Everything

2009-08-08T19:39:00.000-07:00

I've received these sort of email/forwards before and they always remind me of Ecclesiastes 3.

It's easy for me to think of people who have come and gone in my life, but what each person has represented can sometimes be tricky.

Maybe we're not always supposed to 'know'? I'm thankful for the people that I do have in my life and hope that these are lifetime relationships:

People come into your life for a reason, a season or a lifetime.

When you know which one it is, you will know what to do for that person..

When someone is in your life for a reason, it is usually to meet a need you have expressed. They have come to assist you through a difficulty, to provide you with guidance and support, to aid you physically, emotionally or spiritually. They may seem like a Godsend and they are. They are there for the reason you need them to be.

Then, without any wrongdoing on your part or at an inconvenient time, this person will say or do something to bring the relationship to an end. Sometimes they may pass away. Sometimes they walk away. Sometimes they act up and force you to take a stand. What we must realize is that our need has been met, our desire fulfilled, and their work is done. The prayer you lifted up has been answered and now it is time to move on.

Some people come into your life for a season, because your turn has come to share, grow or learn. They bring you an experience of peace or make you laugh. They may teach you something you have never done. They usually give you an unbelievable amount of joy. Believe it, it is real. But only for a season.

Lifetime relationships teach you lifetime lessons, things you must build upon in order to have a solid emotional foundation. Your job is to accept the lesson, love the person and put what you have learned to use in all other relationships and areas of your life.

Thank you for being a part of my life....whether you were a reason, a season or a lifetime.

Coldplay (Take 4)

2009-07-26T10:14:00.001-07:00

A week and a half ago, a couple of my friends and I went to my fourth Coldplay concert and again, they didn't disappoint!

I have talked to several people who have seen Coldplay for the first time 'expecting' there to be a lull or a mistake made by Chris Martin, but it has yet to happen in my presence!

I think this guy knows how to get the crowd excited and understands that people came from miles away and paid a lot of money to watch their shows - even though they're playing the same songs, night after endless night, it's like they're playing them for the first time!

Man, I looooove this band!

Last year when I saw them in San Jose, they came out in to the crowd a few rows in front of me and I was freaking out - unfortunately, this time around, they were completely opposite of where we were sitting, but they played a little 'Billie Jean' tribute to Michael Jackson and they even sounded perfect doing somebody else's song! It was awesome... we rocked out the 'Woo-Woo's' right on his cue, too!

It was such a great time spending the evening with some amazing friends, dancing, singing, and loving on my most favorite band around! I'm already looking forward to concert number five - wherever that will be...

Me, Elizabeth, Tunde

Coming out in to the crowd

Viva La Vida tour

Singing Billie Jean

Going in to the Sleep Train Amphitheatre

Me, Tunde, Elizabeth

Happy Father's Day

2009-06-21T09:12:00.000-07:00

Happy Father's Day to my two favorite dad's in my life - my bro and my daddio!

Me and Dad

I hope you two have a great day and know that I'm thinking of you and wishing that I could be there to help you celebrate... even though as dad would say, 'Todd, you're not my dad.'

Gilly... Gilly...

Thank you for being good examples to your children, for loving unconditionally, and being the kind of father's that urge open communication, aren't afraid to show your feelings, and say 'I Love You' when you feel like it... I'm so blessed to have you both in my life and love you very much!

Have a great Father's Day to you two, to my friends who are dad's or are GOING to be dad's, and to my uncles and grandpa... this is your day to be recognized - enjoy it with your families!

What Goes Around....

2009-06-19T21:17:00.000-07:00

Remember back in September when my amazing friends and family surprised me with money to purchase a plane ticket home for Christmas? Well, now I know how they felt with their generosity. I have been dying to do this for somebody else and I had the perfect opportunity!

A few weeks ago I went to a friends house for a clothing party and was having a great time chatting with all the ladies, eating snack food, and watching everybody model their new outfits that they wanted to purchase. Things were sort of winding down when my friend, Nicole, and I were speaking with a member of our small group bible study. This woman, Patricia, is a sweet, soft spoken, kind hearted, loving person who is also a family/marriage counselor. All of the ladies, at one point or another, have asked for her advice or opinion on certain relational matters, which she will gladly discuss and talk through with all of us. Needless to say, we love her!!

I met Patricia a year and a half ago when I first signed up for my small group through church. I felt like I knew her for years - she just has that welcoming personality. Once our group started up again last fall, she had a prior commitment that kept her from coming on a regular basis, so we would only see each other every now and again.

Back in January, she showed up for small group discussion and unbeknownst to some of us, she had been diagnosed with breast cancer and had undergone a mastectomy. I was devastated to hear the news, but she was healing well and getting along nicely....then she told us that even though the doctors had removed everything, they still wanted her to go through a few rounds of chemotherapy. Stunned. I didn't even know what to say.

So for the last few months, this mid 60 year old woman has been going through chemo by herself and still working. She found out that she was being put on a new drug that would cost her more money per month and that was stressing her out, of course. She has a daughter that lives in Texas that she wanted to go visit, but knew she didn't have enough money to get down there right away, so she was setting money aside for her 'Southwest Fund'.

At that exact moment, I was convicted. I stopped listening to anything she was saying. All I heard were the words, "Do something." My first thought: Yeah, right - I'm scraping by as it is, how can I do something when I don't have anything??

The next thing: 'Twenty dollars''. HA, boy, that will get her to the airport - then what? Well, she had just told us that a ticket she saw was around $250 - I quickly figured that if 10 of us give $20, we would have $200 since she said that she did have some money in there already. Good enough.

Patricia had to leave and Nicole and I just stood there in silence for a minute. I turned to her and said, "We have to do something. We're buying her a plane ticket to go see her daughter." Nicole's reply, "I'm in."

Set the wheels in motion!

An email went out to the small group and money started pouring in, just as planned. Even though times are tough, people are so giving in times of need and it just felt GOOD to do this for somebody we love. When all was said and done, we had come up with about $360 to donate to her fund! This was so exciting...

Tuesday night I presented Patricia "the gift" and she was so grateful. Her humbleness was so real and her tears of joy were felt by each of us in the room.

God knew Patricia's need before we did. He presented the circumstance, convicted us, we obeyed and met Him where He wanted us, and the glory is His.

I don't believe that it was any accident that we were all in the same place on a Friday night. What an absolutely great experience to be a part of and NOW I know how my friends and family felt when they were helping me last year! I am still so grateful, just as I know Patricia will be for the months ahead!

Reality

2009-05-24T15:40:00.000-07:00

Have you stopped to think about all of these 'reality' shows that our eyes and brains are consumed with while flipping through the channels? Man, there are a ton of them....

Yesterday I was trying to kill some time before I went to a friends house and I landed on 'Keeping up with the Kardashians'. What a train wreck.

I seriously could not stop watching this show just for the mere fact that these three spoiled, bratty girls were speaking to their mother the way they were. I started crying for the mom because all she asked for was for their respect - (her ex-husband is the late Robert Kardashian, who helped O.J. get acquitted). It was the 5 year anniversary of his death and she was getting emotional talking about him and the girls were telling her to stop crying and that they 'didn't even want to think about him or look at her'.

Isn't this where, as a daughter, you're supposed to reach out to your mom, embrace her with a big hug, and tell her that you miss your dad, too? Or show SOME sort of compassion?? The mom ended up leaving and crying... my heart hurt for her. I do know one thing, if I would have said the things they were saying to her, my face would have been slapped in to next week. No joke.

So what makes these shows 'real'? I don't know any of my friends that drive a new Mercedes SUV? My friends don't have a dad or step dad that is a former Olympian? None of us are 'known' for our shapely behinds and none of us are dating NFL players? This is real life? Do you know that one of the girls spent $19, 700.00 in ONE store on a shopping spree? This is quite possibly a yearly salary for some people. How sad. She didn't even blink an eye....just handed over her credit card and smiled.

And there I sat watching.

I'm mortified that 'John & Kate Plus 8' are making headlines for his 'questionable' behavior and possible affair and that people really like her hair cut. How real is their life of nannies, book signings, the boys of O.C.C. stopping by to give them new Choppers (because what parent of 8 children doesn't need a new motorcycle), and housing a tv crew and having a body guard follow you everywhere?

Somewhere I had read that most reality show couples end up in divorce after the cameras quit rolling and people are no longer interested in their lives. For example, remember 'Til Death Do Us Part' with Carmen Electra and her then husband Dave Navarro? Oh and my favorite, 'The Newlyweds' with Jessica Simpson and Nick Lachey - I secretly hope they get back together some day. 'Hogan Knows Best' - yet another couple going through a divorce...

I know one thing, when I get approached to do a reality show, I won't do it just so I don't jinx my own marriage. Oh wait, I have to get married first...

Does this mean that I'll stop watching this sickness? Probably not.

I still love 'The Hills' and watching these young kids think that they're important spending mom and dad's money. Do they know that they're termed 'TV Personalities'? They're not actresses or actors. They're not known for their musical talents, modeling careers, or intellect. They're known for being on tv and causing drama.

I think I'm happy living in my real life, having my real bills to pay for, and having real friends who won't throw me under the bus the first chance they get.

However, it is people like me that keep these stupid shows on the air. Sigh.

SURPRISE!!

2009-05-15T21:22:00.000-07:00

I can't tell you how much I love surprises - I love being surprised (well, not like jumping out from behind the door sort of surprised) and I love giving or being a part of the surprise!

My brother, sister in law, and myself decided a few months ago that we would surprise mom for her 60th birthday and Mother's Day - it all worked out so perfectly! Ooooh, I love it!

So I thought I would be sneaky and send a few pictures to the folks during the day of the ocean - after all, I did tell them that's where I would be over the weekend. The first one really was from the coast - but from January - and from my friend, Elizabeth. The second picture was of me at the 'ocean', but I was really at Folsom Lake back in March on a super windy day... I thought that would suffice as the, 'Hey, look at me - I'm at the ocean' picture. I sent the first one at my layover and the second one before my brother dropped me off with Evonn! hee hee...

I got to ride up to my brother's house with my sister in law to surprise the kids since they were home from school. I think they were just confused, but it was so much fun seeing them and kissing their little cheeks! I couldn't get over how tall they are getting and Zoe's new teeth that are coming in! I miss them.

We head out to mom and dad's house after Evonn called to see if it would be ok if her and the kids went out 'to show them something'. I couldn't wait! We jumped out of the car and hid on the other side of the garage while Evonn pulled up to the house. I could hear my dad's voice as they were coming outside and mom wondering where the kids were - that's when she saw me and screamed my name and said, "I JUST KNEW IT!" I think the whole block heard her. We hugged and cried, hugged some more, and cried a while longer... it was so great seeing my mom and dad again!

Friday morning I got to do something that I hadn't done for YEARS - I went with mom to have coffee at her friends house with 6 other women. We ate snacks, had drinks, listened to the town gossip, and told stories. I had sooo much fun listening and laughing with these women! Afterwards we went to mom's work so we could say hi to everybody and visit for a few minutes, then it was back home for the afternoon.

I realized how much I miss the silence... it's so quiet out there - at night when I was in bed, I could actually hear the frogs and not the constant whirr of cars flying by, sirens, honking horns, people talking, and doors slamming. (Which kind of makes me sound like I live in the ghetto, but I really don't!). Anyway, I could smell the lilacs outside, hear the birds chirping, and the church bells at noon playing songs. Ahhh....

Friday night was surprise number two. We had mom's three best friends come over to my brother's house for a surprise birthday party. Once we turned the corner to his house, it finally sunk in who was standing in his driveway - I love the look on her face when she's surprised! They had catered in some Famous Dave's BBQ, Evonn had the house decorated so nicely, we had a super yummy chocolate cake with chocolate chips inside, an Edible Arrangement of fruit, and some drinks to celebrate our mom! The night was spent talking, getting reacquainted, telling stories, laughing, and Keegan wondering when 'all these old people are going to leave'! :)

I spent the night with Keegan (Zoe opted out of camping on the air mattress - smart girl) and in the morning all of us girls met at the mall to have some much needed coffee and a little snack. I loved my muffie from Panera. Muffie. Muuuffie. (Don't tell me that's not fun to say!) After a little bit of shopping, we had lunch at the Cheesecake Factory and back to the shopping... why is it when you want to spend money, you can't ever find anything, but when you DON'T want to spend money, you buy up the store? Grr.. I wanted something, but only got a watch battery. And really, I don't think he ever changed it because my watch still isn't working. Jerky.

I guess I did get something though - the generic version of Dippin' Dots, of course! Mint chocolate chip and cookie dough...you can never go wrong.

Sunday was Mother's Day and we all went to church together - it was a great sermon and fun to see faces that I hadn't seen in a while. After church we had lunch at O'Charley's and headed back home. Dad and I took the Corvette out for a spin which always makes me happy and smiley to hear it rev up! And it makes me smile when we watch ourselves drive really slow down main street so we can see our reflection in the store windows... right, dad? :)

The weekend ended all too quickly as I got ready to pack it up and head back to CA Monday afternoon. My brother met us for a bite to eat, we said our goodbyes, had our hugs, and the next thing I know, I'm back in 80F weather and back to reality.

Mom, happy birthday and happy Mother's Day - it was such a great weekend and definitely one that I'll never forget! You are so special to so many people, we're all blessed to have you be a part of our lives, and we all love you dearly! "Best weekend ever!!" :)

The San Francisco Treat

2009-05-12T20:18:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago, my bff, April, came out to spend a long weekend with me and it was needed so much! I decided that four months is TOO LONG to go without seeing your friends...

I had such a blast showing my friend around town, visiting new places, and of course - EATING! We kept weighing ourselves to see how much we were gaining during her visit...you know it's not going to go well when the first thing you eat is an In-N-Out burger at 11pm. Oh well, it was vacation!

For starters, her poor flight was delayed in Denver for a few hours for some mechanical issues. I was beside myself - after working a full day and so ready to see her, I don't think I could have waited another 5 minutes! She finally got in around 10pm and we were up til 1:30am chatting...of course, this would be 3:30am 'her time'. Good thing she's a mom and is used to running on fumes!

The first day we headed downtown to meet our classmate, Travis, at Mikuni's - an awesome sushi restaurant that I fell in love with the second night I moved to Sacramento, no thanks to Trav! After lunch, we headed to Old Sac to check out the little shops along the wooden sidewalks (think Living History Farms), the American River and the 'famous' Tower Bridge, and to do a little shopping. She got to meet my friend, Elizabeth, for a few minutes and then we hit the Capitol, and headed over to Travis and Jen's for some good food and wine the rest of the night....and whatever else Travis could find in the cupboard! ha ha...

Friday we decided to lay low and head over to Folsom Prison to check the place out. I can safely say, that although it sounds kind of dorky that we went there, we both had so much fun in the gift shop talking to the lady behind the counter. Among the Johnny Cash memorabilia, the wall of confiscated shanks and historic items, she told us some amazing stories from the inside....she used to work inside the prison and I'm sure she could have told us hours of things that we would have soaked in!

Saturday morning we headed over to San Francisco bright and early. I rented a Go-Car for the day in order for us to see parts of the city that we normally wouldn't have known about. It was such a blast and I totally felt like the movie 'Dumb and Dumber' driving this little thing around town!

It runs on a moped motor and you can't take it across the bridge, on sidewalks, or in the bike lane - so instead, going up these massive hills at 35mph, you have a steady stream of cars behind you wanting to run you over. It was pretty intimidating riding next to Hummer's and RV's, but so much fun! We stopped along several places to take pictures of the coast, the Golden Gate Bridge (like I needed any more of that), and the city in general. The weather was great - a little chilly, but super clear, thank goodness. Poor April got soaked by a wave while she was trying to write her husband's name in the sand, so we did have to stop and buy some new shoes and socks for her. I felt so bad. We had lunch at Pier 39, saw the sea lions, and shared some ice cream. Ahh.

We stayed at an awesome hotel downtown at Union Square and enjoyed the night with another one of my friends who came in from out of town. I forgot how much I loved long islands - and how much long islands don't love me. (RT, remember 2fer Tuesday's above Cy's on pool night? ha ha)

Needless to say, Sunday morning came too fast, but there was a diner close by for breakfast and then we high tailed it back home to lay around the rest of the day. We did manage to head over to BJ's for some pizza and a pizookie and that made us happy. Good thing we skipped weighing ourselves.

Vacation ended all too soon as April left Monday morning at the crack of dawn and I went back to reality while she hopped a flight back to Iowa. I cried. A lot.

Regardless, I had such an awesome time and have found that although we can spend 4 days together, I never get tired of talking with her, hearing her laugh, hugging her, and knowing all too well that no matter what happens in our friendship, we will always be each other's friend.

I love you and can't thank you enough for taking time out of your busy schedule and to be away from your husband and baby just to see little ol' me! I appreciated it so much...You made it all so wonderful....ABSOLUTELY!! :)

He is Risen...

2009-04-12T10:12:00.001-07:00

Happy Easter!

Thank goodness my pastor is not a morning person... our 'sunrise' service started at 7:30am and we got a complimentary cinnamon roll for being up so early on a Sunday. It was delish.

I love the resurrection message of Jesus Christ and need to be reminded of it on a daily basis, but the annual message always hits a little deeper to my core.

As a side note, I do need to point out that I long for my former church (back home) and Pastor Mike's heart felt message that reaches the masses. He has always done a great job of speaking on the subject and nobody can ever compare to him in my mind, but the holy spirit works in others differently and it's not fair to compare him to my current pastor. Doesn't mean I still don't want to listen to the big guy preach!

There is a song that is sung that can bring a tear to my eye as soon as the first chord is strung (and boy were they a flowin' this morning!)

They played the following song and I wanted to share it with you because it has meant so much to me - ironically, I had never heard it until I moved away and my eyes have been opened to what the words really stand for in my life and hopefully yours as well.

'Jesus Paid It All' sung by Kristian Stanfill:

I hear the Savior say
Thy strength indeed is small
Child of weakness....watch and pray
Find in me....thine all in all

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

Lord, now indeed I find
Thy power and Thine alone
Can change the leper's spots
And melt the heart of stone

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

And when before thy throne
I stand in Him complete
Jesus died my soul to save
My lips shall still repeat

Jesus paid it all
All to Him I owe
Sin had left a crimson stain
He washed it white as snow

Oh praise the One who paid my debt
And raised this life up from the dead
Oh praise the One who paid my debt
And raised this life up from the dead

Black Belts

2009-04-10T10:24:00.000-07:00

I am so proud of my sister in law and nephew for testing and receiving their black belts in Tae Kwon Do last weekend! This is such a huge feat for anybody to obtain and from the sounds of it, they did an awesome job!

Thinking back through the years of practice, hard work, dedication, hours spent learning forms, techniques, and all other facets involved, really proves what perseverance can do for a person. I can't even imagine how proud my brother must have felt watching his wife and son give their absolute BEST last week...I know just looking through almost 300 pictures, that MY buttons were bursting at the seams :)

Congratulations on receiving your black belts, Evonn and Keegan! I wish I could have been there to cheer you on, but I'm just as proud of you being miles away! Can't wait to see pictures with your new belts! I love you...

Keegan

Evonn

Keegan kick

Evonn's air time

Keegan breaking boards

Note to self: Don't mess with mommy

Keegan giving his speech

Todd, Keegan, and Evonn

Tahoe

2009-03-28T15:23:00.000-07:00

Last weekend was my first trip to South Lake Tahoe, NV and it was fabulous! The drive up there was gorgeous and coming down into Tahoe was amazing...however, the steep drop offs next to me...not so cool...

It was also the first time that I went to an overnight women's retreat for church. Aside from the grocery store, I don't think I've ever seen so much chocolate in one place!

There were 4 of us to a room in a little cabin and the first that I noticed - no TV. I thought it was 'weird', but then I realized why I was there in the first place. We were able to take in the sights at a ski resort called Heavenly and to also walk around our little area before dinner began. I took some pictures of the lake, mountains in the distance, and the sun setting - it was breath taking, to say the least.

Our Cabin

We spent Friday night in a worship service with 240 women, had small group time, and then played some games afterwards. Needless to say, it was late when we finished and even later before we went to bed. I think I ran on about 4.5 hours of sleep the first night....zzzzz....

Sunset

Saturday we got up for breakfast and hit the sermons again - the theme was called 'Wide Awake: Fulfilling your God Given Dreams'. You know me and how I love my dreams... well, this wasn't about the 'weird' dreams we have at night, but the dreams that God sets in our heart - those nagging feelings/ideas that won't go away no matter how you try to shake them. Circumstances arise where we're not able to reach our dreams, be it financially, the wrong timing (starting a family), and most commonly out of fear. We fear that we will fail and we fear that if we pursue our dream, it won't be what we dreamt.

Me at Sunrise

I actually learned a lot from the retreat and not only am I living my dream out right now by being in California, but I have had a dream placed on my heart since I was a child. Now I need to open my mind and my heart and try to pursue it. However, fear has set in.

Do you know we're born with two natural fears? Falling and loud noises. All other fears are learned (I learned to fear spiders after watching my mom jump around and blow on them before she killed them). So for any of us to fear stems from a 'lie' and it becomes a battle within our mind: False Evidence Appearing Real = FEAR.

Anyway, I attended three really good workshops, was fed really well, and loved the worship music and sermons that were spoken. Coming back to reality was hard though. You're in such a beautiful place, listening to women's stories, and reflecting on your own and then we all got puked back in to the real world really fast. But it was so worth it.

The last night we were there, it snowed. I hate snow. But for the record, it was beautiful. The pine trees were weighed down with it and for a second, it felt like home again. It was quiet, the wind was blowing, and then the sun would peek through for a brief time. It really was pretty.

Snow

Me in the snow

What is your dream? Does God have something placed on your heart? Dream big and let your light shine.

Mountains across the lake

Clearest water I've ever seen

Another Year

2009-03-18T19:18:00.000-07:00

Well, another milestone has passed...my two year California anniversary is tomorrow and in thinking back over just this past year, a lot has definitely changed!

I feel more 'comfortable'living here now and the homesickness has definitely died down from that first year. I'm not saying that I don't get it or still think about home, but this has become my way of living. I've gotten into a routine, made new friends, and continued to expand in so many areas of my life that I never thought would have been possible. Ask me how I'm doing in a few more months and maybe that will all change!

You can easily track my whereabouts and what I've been up to through reading older posts on here, but the major changes have taken place within myself. Sometimes I didn't realize how strong I really can be and at other times, I find myself at my weakest and not knowing where to turn or who to turn to. It can be a very lonely place.

I continue to grow in my small groups at church and being with this amazing group of women (whom I definitely can call my friends) they encourage me, lift me up, and challenge me at the same time. I have been awakened to some characteristics and qualities that I have held on to and need to focus on changing and they're always there for me... I've met some struggles and have freely spoken about them, and again, they give me their 'mom' and 'best friend' perspectives on the subject. I honestly don't know what I would have done had I not met them, but I firmly believe that God had His hand in this all along and knew that I would need people like this in my life while I'm not around my core support group of family and friends back home.

All in all, it has been a good 2nd year here, though some obstacles were thrown in the mix! I've had break-ups, health concerns, family and friends who have passed away and I wasn't able to be home with everybody during those times, and of course the nagging feeling of missing my niece and nephew growing up - this is the one that really chokes me up... However, I have been able to still do new things (hello, rode a bike for 8 miles - which is FAR for somebody who hasn't been on a bike in years!),I've been to places that I probably wouldn't have seen or experienced, and all of the little things that make my life here enjoyable - mainly my friends.

I appreciate everybody's continued support over the last 2 years and can't thank you enough for the constant prayers, emails, cards, and phone calls. You've been just as much of my journey as I have and it's been a fun ride :)

On a side note, for those who have asked, I'm still holding strong with my Lent quest of one hour of tv a day... I did falter during the finale of the Bachelor, but I didn't watch any tv the following night! hee hee... I have found that I don't 'crave' tv any more and it's almost liberating not being tied up for hours on end. I have read some incredible books the last few weeks and have finally devoted that extra time to the One that this is all for...it's been very healing for me, to say the least.

My BFF, April, is coming out here next month and I can't wait for some girl time! Oh my gosh, it will be so much fun! I know I'll be a crying fool when I pick her up at the airport, but it's ok - she knows I'm an ugly crier :) I have a few things planned, but mostly, I just want to spend some time alone with her to get reconnected! Wee Hoo!

Well, two years of learning, growing, experiencing, and spreading my wings has definitely gone by fast...this has been the best journey I have ever been on!

Cheers to another year ;)

Everything

2009-03-07T11:39:00.000-08:00

Season of Lent

2009-03-01T13:02:00.000-08:00

The dictionary gives us the following definition of Lent:

Lent - noun
(In the Christian religion) an annual season of fasting and penitence in preparation for Easter, beginning on Ash Wednesday and lasting 40 weekdays to Easter, observed by Roman Catholic, Anglican, and certain other churches.

This is the first year that I am truly in observance of the season of Lent and I'm finding it difficult, yet rewarding at the same time. I say this after only five days.

Last night in church we learned that Lent is also a season for becoming holy. It's an appeal to God for a clean and good conscience. If we can choose something to offer up to God that would put our focus on Jesus instead, it would be part of a process of sanctification. Other processes might include prayer, fasting, and self denial.

This year I'm offering up TV... I know some people don't have lives consumed by their television, but I do. I am only limiting myself to one hour of tv per day intead of the normal five that I can do during the week and who knows how many hours on the weekends. I started 'practicing' last Sunday and did pretty well and then kept on going through the week. So far, so good.

I bought a lot of books off of Amazon to fill up my time and am going to start journaling some thoughts on paper again. I used to journal ALL the time, but then stopped. Blogging sort of counts, but all of my deepest thoughts and emotions can't be put down on here for the whole world to see!

We also learned that Lent is not a law or a rule that is stated in the bible (I always assumed it was in there under fine print). We had an uneven exchange with Jesus - he died for all of our sins and the least we could do is spend 40 days with a good faith appeal for a clean conscience and to just seek Christ... it really is all about your heart.

We were told not to judge the sacrifices of others - if somebody is giving up chocolate, I shouldn't go to them and be like, 'Big whoop! Chocolate... that's lame!' because we don't know what the one (or more) 'things' are that keep people from knowing Jesus. Maybe their lives are consumed with chocolate? Who are we to judge?

I also learned not to focus on the loopholes... and I found a loophole - movies. My friend and I were having a discussion about that this morning and then another friend brought up the same thing! We're not sure if this would count or not. I said 'no' because for myself personally, tv is mind numbing. I find myself staring at it, but not really watching it or I'll just have it on for background noise. Movies you would be focused on and learning the plot... see, loophole. I can justify anything.

I feel like I'm going to be transformed in the next 40 (or less) days and am excited for what lies ahead. I just hope that I can meet God where He wants me to be and that I will be able to focus more on what kind of person I want to become with His help.

Birthday Calculator

2009-02-26T18:30:00.000-08:00

I love goofy things like this: http://www.paulsadowski.org/BirthDay.asp

This is called the birthday calculator and tells you all sorts of 'facts' about your date of birth.

Here are a few snippets from mine that were right on!

14 August 1974

Your date of conception was on or about 21 November 1973 which was a Wednesday. (Gross, mom and dad - were you celebrating Todd's upcoming birthday or something?!)

You were born on a Wednesday under the astrological sign Leo. (RAWRRR!)

Your Life path number is 7.

Your fortune cookie reads: Only love lets us see normal things in an extraordinary way.

Life Path Compatibility:You are most compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 1, 5 & 7.

You should get along well with those with the Life Path numbers 4 & 22.

You may or may not get along well with those with the Life Path number 9.

You are least compatible with those with the Life Path numbers 2, 3, 6, 8 & 11. (That seems like a lot of people not to get along with, doesn't it?)

The golden number for 1974 is 18.

Your birthday falls into the Chinese year beginning 1/23/1974 and ending 2/10/1975.

You were born in the Chinese year of the Tiger. (As in the GC Tigers)

Your plant is Raspberry. (I like raspberry yogurt)

The date of Easter on your birth year was Sunday, 14 April 1974.

The date of Ash Wednesday (the first day of Lent) on your birth year was Wednesday 27 February 1974.

As of 2/26/2009 8:32:01 PM ESTYou are 34 years old.You are 414 months old.You are 1,802 weeks old.You are 12,615 days old.You are 302,780 hours old.You are 18,166,832 minutes old.You are 1,090,009,921 seconds old. (Oh geez.. now I feel old - shut up, Ty.)

Celebrities who share your birthday:
Halle Berry (1968)
Earvin 'Magic' Johnson (1959)
Gary Larson (1950) (Mr. Far Side - I'm going to get tutored!)
Danielle Steel (1947)
Susan St. James (1946)
Steve Martin (1945) (Two wild and c-razy guys!)
David Crosby (1941)

Top songs of 1974
The Way We Were by Barbra Streisand
Seasons In the Sun by Terry Jacks
The Streak by Ray Stevens (I used to love this song - thought it was hilarious)
Having My Baby by Paul Anka
Kung Fu Fighting by Carl Douglas (YES!!!)
Billy, Don't Be a Hero by Bo Donaldson & the Heywoods
Annie's Song by John Denver
The Loco-Motion by Grand Funk
TSOP (The Sound of Philadelphia) by MFSB with the Three Degrees
I Can Help by Billy Swan

Your lucky day is Sunday.

Your lucky number is 1 & 4. (Weird, huh? I was born on the 14th)

Your ruling planet(s) is Sun. (I do love the sun. Just not the damage.)

Your lucky dates are 1st, 10th, 19th, 28th.

Your opposition sign is Aquarious.

Your opposition number(s) is 8.

Today is not one of your lucky days! (Go figure.)

There are 169 days till your next birthdayon which your cake will have 35 candles.Those 35 candles produce 35 BTUs,or 8,820 calories of heat (that's only 8.8200 food Calories!) .You can boil 4.00 US ounces of water with that many candles. (Who figures this stuff out, seriously?)

Your birthstone is Peridot -->The Mystical properties of Peridot:
Peridot is used to help dreams become a reality. (I do love my dreams.)

Your birth tree is Poplar, the Uncertainty - Looks very decorative, no self-confident behaviour, only courageous if necessary, needs goodwill and pleasant surroundings, very choosy, often lonely, great animosity, artistic nature, good organiser, tends to philosophy, reliable in any situation, takes partnership serious. (hmm...very true)

There are 302 days till Christmas 2009! (YAY!)

Groceries 101

2009-02-22T20:32:00.000-08:00

Is there a course for grocery baggers to take? If not, there should be.

I have my three little cloth grocery bags that I take to the store every week and I get 5 cents off of my bill for each bag. Yay for me and my attempt at being environmentally conscious.

And every week, the rocket scientists who bag my groceries do the following:

Put 4 - half gallons of liquid (milk, Silk, OJ, & grape juice) in ONE bag... I am not a pack mule. I cannot lift it out of the cart to even put it in my car.

Since when is it ok to put bread on the bottom? Under boxes of yogurt, apples, and oatmeal?

Bananas should not be shoved in small places or between boxes - no wonder they're all ruined and bruised by the next day.

Do you need to put 10 cans in one bag? Again, this is too heavy and almost rips my arm off.

In the off chance that I need to buy a card at the grocery store, I avoid any wet spots on the check out belt - but thank you, grocery bagger for putting the frozen blueberries on top of it so by the time I get home, my envelope looks like I used it as a coaster.

No, I don't need your help to leisurely push the cart out to my car. However, I'm going to need you to come home with me to walk up 22 steps and carry these heavy bags that you over stuffed.

This-N-That

2009-02-21T21:00:00.000-08:00

I've missed blogging.

As we all know, my computer has went to tech heaven, but I was lucky enough to get a loaner computer from a friend...wee hoo! I feel so disconnected from the world when I don't have Internet access at my fingertips. And quite frankly, Face Book misses me. My new (pink) Dell will be here in a few weeks!

Today was the first time that I went on a bike ride in a loooong time. Not because it's been winter or anything, but because I'm very unmotivated to do any sort of physical activity - hence lack of exercise. I hate sweating and I hate working out because my face always becomes 10 shades of red. I have always been that person who needs a little workout buddy to motivate me. I miss being around my brother because he was the reason that I looked forward to working out. Making fake fart noises and all! Anyway, I was lucky enough to get to hang out with Elizabeth and Tunde today and venture out for an 8 mile ride with 3 small children in tow... it was perfect for me because it made me not be the slowest person on the trail :) My arse hurts tonight.

This is always a bit of a special month for me because it marks the month of my baptism when I was 25. I look forward to lighting my baptism candle every year, but I realized that it's somewhere in Iowa. I ransacked my closet trying to find it and finally gave up. Sigh. It's not like I was worshipping my candle or anything, but watching the flame flicker and reflecting back on the years in which I have been able to call upon Christ is a nice meditation time for me, I suppose.

Some sad news on the home front... my cousins' grandma passed away on Friday and these are the times where I really miss being home. This woman has been as much a part of my life as long as I can remember - just being at several family dinners and get togethers, birthday parties, seeing them at the fair, parades, etc. I'm definitely one of those people who needs closure and it's tough not being able to see my family during this difficult time. All I want to do is hug them and tell them how very much I love them. So here are your cyber hugs and my I love you's... she was always well kept, smiling and had a great laugh - I know she'll be missed. As Bob's final prayer to 'be lifted' was spoken - we know that God hears our prayers.

As the season of Lent approaches, I think I have figured out what I need (not so much want) to give up this year, and that is TV. I'm going to limit myself to one hour a night and hope that I can manage my time a little more wisely. I find myself in a constant daze staring at the little black box and not really hearing what's being said when a show is on, but just kind of letting my mind roam. It feels like mush. I'm finding books that I want to read or taking friends' suggestions on other books that they have read. I want to become more intimate with my relationship with God and I know I can't do it sitting on the couch in a mind numbing altered mode. I think this is going to be a great opportunity for me to expand on a few things outside of my little bubble and I'm excited for what lies ahead...

So I bought this perfume that I have a love/hate relationship with right now. My friend wears it and it smells phenomenal on her, but it's all weird on me. Darn my pheromones! So I have taken a poll by asking opinions at work and so far it's 50/50. Some days I love it and other days I think it smells like powder. I dunno. I usually LOVE what I wear, but this one has me stumped. Today I like it.

Dipna introduced me to a new frozen yogurt place called NuYo. I love it because they have self serving soft MINT frozen yogurt. I love mint. (Yes dad, I can see you making that face and sticking your tongue out while you gag and point your finger down your throat!) Anyway, we went there after lunch the other day and I had chopped Andes mints to sprinkle on top with some tiny chocolate chips and a little squirt of dark Ghiradelli chocolate sauce. Heaven. Good thing I had a salad for lunch... I can't wait to go back and do it all over again. However, they did have peanut butter yogurt, too..hmm... do you think the peanut butter outbreak applies to frozen yogurt though?

I have to lead our small group Tuesday night at church and I'm getting nervie. I don't quite know what I'm going to talk about yet, but I haven't had to speak in front of a group since hosting the Alpha course a few years ago. I think I'm just intimidated because it's a new set of women. Not that they're going to flog me or anything, but I don't know personalities and some are more quiet than others. I just hope that it will be a solid group effort and they won't ask me too tough of questions! I guess I could always take a Twix with me - you know that commercial where the woman asks her husband if the dress makes her look fat and he shoves it in his mouth so he can't answer? That's me.

'Stay Classy, San Diego'

FYI

2009-02-05T15:23:00.000-08:00

My laptop took a shat last week, so I will be out of commission for a little while.

Any recommendations on what type of computer I should get once my refund money gets deposited? :)

Weeeee are the Champions...

2009-02-02T10:45:00.000-08:00

Man, it feels good to dominate.

25 Things

2009-01-16T21:39:00.000-08:00

I saw this on my friend's blog and thought I would do it too! Here are 25 things that you may or may not know about me....try it out yourself - it was sort of fun!

1. I was born as a preemie in 1974 with a club foot, a few toes (that the doctor’s were able to ‘make’ into 9 all together), and 8 fingers. I wore corrective shoes for 9 years of my life every night while I slept. I went through several surgeries and can confidently put on my doctor’s check list that I have had legitimate plastic surgeries! I was envious of girls who wore thongs and who could paint their toe nails. I stopped wearing sandals at age 9 because I was tired of people pointing, staring, and whispering. When I turned 30, I made a vow that I would wear sandals confidently. Though I’m still self conscious, I do paint my one toe nail for the world to see =)

2. I love fragrances – the smell of perfume, cologne (meow), candles, lilac flowers, babies after a bath, fresh cut grass, hay, coffee (I won’t drink it) and yes, even the gas station. However, I hate the smell of syrup in the morning. Makes me want to gag.

3. Jell-O should never contain food such as fruit cocktail, peaches, or shredded carrots. Same goes with cottage cheese and yogurt. My throat kind of closed up a little thinking about all of that.

4. I saw Cindy Crawford and her husband in Santa Monica a few years ago. It’s safe to say that I was completely star struck and they are two incredibly beautiful people not only in magazines, but in person, too. They are the closest brush with fame that I have gotten.

5. Olivia Newton-John was my idol. I seriously thought I could sing like her. I would record myself in my little Sony tape recorder and when I listened to it over again, I was painfully aware that I sounded like her ailing cat instead. I remember sitting in the corner behind my bed crying one night because I knew I was a terrible singer. I can’t even sing karaoke with my friends because I’m still embarrassed by how I sound.

6. When I would play with my Barbie, I would use my brother’s Big Jim doll and Six Million Dollar Man as her boyfriend(s), but they were both named ‘Jonathan’ in my head. It sounded so much more manly to me. I still like that name.

7. I was always jealous of my friends who were treated like princesses by their dads.

8. I think I’m a really good dancer. I dream about what it would be like to be on Dancing with the Stars without the all over body pain. My boyfriend in college and I tried out some figure skating moves in the living room when the ’98 Winter Olympics in Nagano were on – he would lift me over his head and I would be straight as a board like Super Woman… I really thought I was a good carpet skater.

9. If I had to choose between cake and ice cream at a birthday party, I always go for the ice cream. I love mint chocolate chip with fine chips… not the chunky junk at Cold Stone. However, I love chocolate ice cream with peanut butter swirls in it, too. I hate strawberry ice cream because again, this goes back to having food in something good…it just messes everything up.

10. I am very protective of my family. I can talk about them, but nobody else can.

11. I marched in the Cotton Bowl and Fiesta Bowl parades when I was in high school and played the trumpet. It was such a highlight of my life back then because the only reason I made it was because I worked hard to get there. I can’t read music all that well, but if I hear a song and how it’s supposed to sound, I am able to ‘read’ it on my own.

12. I am a hypochondriac, I have had panic attacks, I pick my lip when I worry or think about things. I have too many OCD tendencies that drive me nuts. But it all works for me. Sorta.

13. I’m at a point in my life where I’m scared that I won’t be able to have children someday. All I want is to be a wife, a mother, lead by example, teach my kids about God’s love, and live long enough to watch them grow up and branch out on their own.

14. I love traveling and seeing the country side. The beach and ocean is my favorite, but looking at the mountains is a close second…

15. I have been in 9 weddings.

16. I love being in love…the butterflies, the excitement, the anticipation, surprises, and knowing that somebody is into you just as much as you’re into them. I have had my heart broken way more times than I have been in love though… In God’s timing, the future Mr. Marcie will make up for all the boys that have hurt me. The hardest part about being single is the lack of cuddling.

17. I have been to 26 states – I’m over halfway to seeing them all!

18. I have never inhaled….either cigarettes or the doobs. Too scared that I would like them…

19. When I was a kid, I used to have recurring dreams that the devil lived behind the babysitter’s furnace. Every time I would walk by it in my dream, he would reach out and grab my arm, but I would break free and run upstairs to safety. Not only was I petrified of the furnace, I almost think it’s symbolic today that my dreams are so significant – I also broke free and look ‘up’ for my safety now.

20. I don’t have any feeling in the lower half of my lip and chin after getting my wisdom teeth pulled and cutting a nerve. So if you see stuff drizzling down my face, please let me know – I can’t feel it.

21. I used to be a good artist and I sometimes wonder if I could pick it up again. However, I love taking pictures more than anything. I have 8 albums that hold 504 pictures each and I’m good about reminiscing for hours on end when looking through them.

22. Bo Duke and Terry Bradshaw were two men that I had a huge crush on when I was little…and I really, really thought that I would be able to marry one of them when I grew up.

23. I have finally gotten past the negative stigma of being ‘Todd’s sister’ and have learned to embrace it. He’s a pretty good guy and I’m proud to be his sister.

24. I’ve always wanted to pierce my nose, eyebrow, or get a tattoo, but I’m a super chicken. The bellybutton is about all I can handle.

25. Mickey Mouse is creepy.

Holiday Fun

2009-01-15T20:34:00.000-08:00

Me & Kelli the day before I left

Amy & her small tribe of women

Evonn & Todd (thank you for not making a dorky face)

Zoe (toothless) and Keegan (too cool for pictures)

Me and Joan at our "only" hang out - Champp's!

Shonda - my BFF

My little Kerry - I heart you.

Addy & Aspyn - first thing Addy mentioned was the peanut butter balls. Acorn didn't fall too far from the tree....

Miss Mandy

April & me New Year's Eve - uh yeah, are you here for the private party?

Missy and her son, Carson - I think the timer threw him!

Kelli Ann stopped by with her clan :)

Heidi and me at Kelli's house

Pretty little Kaley - my cousin and me at Grandpa's house

My cousin, Kari - can you tell we're related?

Hilary & I on Christmas day

Keegan, Me, Zoe on Christmas Eve

Me & Mama before Christmas Eve (eve) services

Det, John, Me, Todd, Ryan - Go STEELERS!!

Jacie Jo at her mom and dad's
Me and dad on Christmas Eve (eve)

I'm finally get back into the groove of things now that Christmas, New Year's, and traveling is done and over with... getting settled back into my routine at work and 'living' again! It's funny how rejuvinating vacations are - especially when you're spending it with family and friends!

I won't bore you with the day to day events, but know that if it weren't for Missy, Kerry, and April planning my trip back home, I wouldn't have had the opportunity to see everybody and enjoy every bit of time that I had while back in Iowa! THANK YOU, thank you, thank you... from the bottom of my heart...

I enjoyed great food like Det's delicious pho, homemade sugar cookies (mom even made an extra batch), peanut butter balls, chipped beef gravy over homemade biscuits, taco pizza, and hamballs...needless to say, my pants were fitting a little more snug by the time I left :)

Keegan and Zoe were the highlight for me - listening to their stories, seeing the changes that have taken place in them in just six months, having Zoe draw me some beautiful pictures, spending time with Keegan and having him occupy my lap, and listening to their little laughs.

Two of the funniest things that happened was when Zoe was drying dishes on Christmas Eve and I walked behind her and poked her side. She turned around with the meanest look on her face and threw one fist up, then the other and said very sternly, "I used to take Tae Kwon Do!" Well, in that case, I'd better shield myself...

The other was when we were all sleeping in on the air mattresses and Zoe says, "Do you know why I like it when you spend the night with us? Because your teeth glow in the dark. I always know that you're here by me because I can see them." She said it was a good thing, but my I had a bit of complex thinking about Ross from "Friends'' when he had his teeth whitened and they were glowing in the dark! LOL...

Hope you enjoyed the pictures from my trip!

This is So True!

2008-12-11T08:42:00.000-08:00

You can kiss your family and friends good-bye and put miles between you, but at the same time you carry them with you in your heart, your mind, your stomach, because you do not just live in a world but a world lives in you.

- Frederick Buechner, Telling The Truth

Brrr...

2008-12-07T13:20:00.000-08:00

It's getting cold here and by cold, I mean, it's still above freezing!

Friday night I went with one of my friends to a middle school ministry 'mystery' outing. We were in charge of taking middle schoolers around town to pray for certain places - for example, the first place stopped was the police station so we could pray for safety, justice, etc. Next on the list was one of the middle schools, the pastor's house, and then back to the church to pray for their ministry program and then to eat pizza! Each place we stopped, we had to stand outside and I didn't know this beforehand - so I was freezing my little tush off for 2 hours.

And just for the record, I decided that I do not want a junior high-aged boy when I grow up :)

Saturday I got a little bit of shopping done and then headed down to Elk Grove with one of my friends to a cookie exchange. I love attending to those little get togethers! We had a few drinks, some appetizers (yay, little weenies!), and a ton of cookies! I think I had at least 10 cookies just sitting there visiting ...they were SO good, though.

This morning some of my friends and I headed out to cheer on one of our coworkers as he ran a marathon around Sacramento. It was so cold, foggy, and misty - I had on double layers of everything! We almost missed him running by, but luckily saw him when he was right in front of us! Good job, Chester!

Elizabeth & Marcie waiting for Chester to run by

He's so nice that he stops running to give hugs!

It's been a great weekend with friends and being able to get out and have some fun! But I'm more looking forward to getting home in 12 days to see my family...it'll be here before we know it!

I can't wait :)

Happy Thanksgiving!

2008-11-27T07:56:00.000-08:00

Thanksgiving. It’s that time of year to look back, give thanks, and offer gratitude… what a great time to reminisce.

I’ve been thinking about what I’m thankful for this year and I have come up with a few things to share.

I’m thankful for my mom, dad, brother, sister in law, nephew, and niece – I honestly don’t know what I would do without their support, love, encouragement, pictures, email, cards, gift packages, and phone calls week after week. It all brightens my day knowing that you’re thinking of me and only wanting what’s best in my life. I love you so much....Thank you!

I’m thankful for God’s endless blessings that He continues to pour out on me day after day. I usually see a beautiful sunrise and/or sunset and finally experience the changing season!

I’m thankful to have a job, the air in my lungs, and a roof over my head.

I’m thankful for the friends that I have back home who have supported me and my move out West 100% and those friends that continue to have my six. Not to mention the friends that I have made out here who have blessed me in countless ways by getting to the root of who they are, what we mean to one another, being my support system, learning about each other on an intimate level, growing in our friendships, trusting, and loving. I can’t imagine my life without any of you in it….thank you….

I’m thankful for God’s emotional healing. When things were at such a low, painful point and I didn’t know how to cope, He came in to my heart, comforted me and raised me up to show me that better things lie ahead in my future. We formed a much needed relationship with one another – one that I had sought for years. Broken hearts can be mended and later healed with time and nurturing. Our lives intersect with one another for certain reasons and sometimes it’s hard for us to figure them out in the here and now, but they become more revealed with each passing day. I’m thankful for the heartache and experiences that I’ve had because it’s making me a stronger woman.

I’m thankful for my church ladies (insert your visual of Dana Carvey here). They are a group of wonderful women that I’ve gotten to know over the past year that act as my mother(s), friend, counselor, and sisters. They have been beside me as I have walked through a spiritual journey that I have never been on before. They are loving, supportive, knowledgeable, generous, and hilarious! I look forward to seeing them every week because they are safe and comfortable….my home away from home.

And last, but not least – I’m thankful for the Steelers.

I hope you all enjoy your Thanksgiving with family and friends – share with one another (and me) what YOU are thankful for this year.

Everybody has something to share – take the time to listen and open your hearts…

Day Trip

2008-11-25T18:32:00.000-08:00

Old Faithful geyser (not THE Old Faithful though)

Me by the geyser

Redwoods at Leggett

Drive Thru tree

Me inside a stump

Ring tailed lemur...I like to move it, move it

Pregnant giraffes

He was curious and wanted to check things out

White Rhino named Eesha (meaning Princess)

Watusi cow named Eileen (she had a syndrome where she has both male and female horns) and she was all by herself...I felt sorry for her

Wildabeest

Safari West from the hill

African Cheetah - she ate a bird in front of some 2nd graders the other day! The other cheetahs were raised on a reserve, so they were mellow, but this one never stopped pacing

Flamingos and giraffe

I had an opportunity to head up north to check out the Avenue of the Giants, Old Faithful geyser, and an African Safari over the weekend and it was so much fun! I love scenery and country side gawking around, so this was right up my alley. The weather was perfect and the trees were changing colors - absolutely beautiful! Going through the redwoods in the early morning light with the fog was amazing, too....I love how God always speaks to me through his 'artwork'!

Dunzo

2008-11-15T10:12:00.000-08:00

After ten years of making monthly payments to the U.S. Department of Education, I can finally say that my college student loans are officially paid off! WEE FREAKING HOO!!

I never thought this day would come - or at least I didn't think it would when I received my first bill in the mail. Talk about a cloud of doom hanging over a fresh graduates head...

In looking back, I sure borrowed a lot of money for beer, good times, and great memories :)

But it was so worth it.

Bye-bye loans.

To Accuse

2008-11-05T19:06:00.000-08:00

Have you ever been falsely accused of something? How does that make you feel? I know for me, it feels pretty numbing.

I have been accused of many things - from personal attacks on my character to the 'what he said/she said' sorted comments that can be misconstrued through communication.

Yesterday couldn't have ended any sooner. Work was mind boggling to begin with, but knowing that I got to go vote afterwards gave me something to look forward to in order to top my day off. I was excited, I knew I was making a difference with my vote, and I was going to be a part of history one way or the other. After I got out of the polls, I came home to a note on the door - "Now what?", I thought.

I started shaking my head as soon as I opened it - it was a 3 Day Past Due Notice that the apartment gods didn't receive my rent check. Are you kidding me!? I am so OCD when it comes to paying my bills on time that I actually write my rent check out for the following month two weeks in advance. That's right... just to make sure all is in good order. Now, let me remind you that two months ago, they admittedly 'threw' my last rent check away 'on accident' - because, 'you know, it happens'... not only did I have to put a stop pay on the last check, I had to immediately take them a new one to cover for the 'late' payment. Even though it wasn't late. It was freaking lost.

Livid. That would pretty much sum up my feelings looking at this stupid piece of paper.

Naturally, I call to explain what is happening - and by 'explain', I mean yell at the poor girl who happened to answer the phone about how inept and irresponsible they were for not double checking the envelope that rent came in ... and then get transfered to one of the managers.

After waiting on hold for eternity, I get some chipper sounding woman who needs me to explain everything to her. People, I'm trying my hardest to stay calm and keep a pleasant tone, but get this - after I told her what had happened two months ago she says, 'Well, don't you think it's pretty ironic that it's always YOUR check that gets lost? Why is it always YOU who has this problem? I'm thinking YOU didn't pay your rent and you're trying to get out of the late fee that I'm going to charge you anyway for not having it in on time.'

My retort, "MY CHECK ISN'T LATE - YOU LOOOOST IT!!" So much for calm. Then it hit me - I can continue on arguing with this woman and not get anywhere or try a different approach. (Punching her in the neck was my actual approach, but she was out of arm shot.) I decided to be nice. To take it down a notch. Maybe she was having a bad day? But dang it, I had a bad day, too.

So I told her that I was sorry for raising my voice and that I wanted to resolve this - what did I need to do? Obviously, she still wanted to yell at me for being a dead beat and continue to accuse me of getting out of rent, not being responsible, blah blah blah... Calm... breathe... pray - God let this woman calm down so we can talk... God let me hold my tongue... deep breath...and wouldn't you know... the conversation changed.

I ended up having to go get a cashier's check, put ANOTHER stop pay on this check, and go to the rental office. It was like going in to see the principal - I felt like I was in trouble, but I know in my heart of hearts that I was being honest - I really did pay my rent. But how do you convince somebody that your words are true? I had the proof with my duplicate checks. It wouldn't help.

The lady I had spokent to was gone, but the other woman working gave me that condescending look and accompanying sneer and said, "Oh, I know what this is about. I'll take that." I smiled, said thank you and walked away.

But before I left, I stopped at the desk where the girl answering the phone was sitting - I told her who I was and apologized for being rude and raising my voice when I called. Her eyes lit up and she said, "Wow - thank you... you're so sweet for going out of your way... but these things happen and I'm sorry they happened to you." Yeah, me too.

You want to know what my bible study sermon was about last night at church? Persecution and how we handle it. Ironic? I didn't think so either.

Trick Or Treat

2008-10-30T12:13:00.001-07:00

I'm not a huge Halloween person, but I do enjoy seeing the little kids all dressed up in their costumes every year.

Last year at work we decorated the whole office and my coworkers (or their spouses) brought in their kids to walk up and down the aisles and get candy from us. It was so much fun and I'm totally looking forward to it again tomorrow. Of course I bought MY favorite candy in case we had some leftovers (Jr. Mints....mmmmmm)!

I haven't been to a costume party in years and doubt I'll go to the one I was invited to this year. I get too freaked out about drunk drivers. When did I get all 'old'? Plus, I didn't want to spend the money on something I'll wear for one night.

I think my favorite 'adult' costume was an angel and my boyfriend at the time was the devil - I had light up wings and a halo and oddly enough after a long night of drinking, my halo burned out. Go figure. It was so cute though... do you have a favorite costume?

Send me pictures of your kids so I can see them all dressed up, too!

Have fun and "Trick or Treat!!"

Sigh

2008-10-28T10:39:00.001-07:00

I have such a bad case of writer's block... I have no idea what to talk about... this is so frustrating. Any ideas, thoughts, opinions? :)

The Countdown is On

2008-10-20T17:12:00.000-07:00

In almost 2 weeks we will be able to use our voices to elect a new president to run our country - how exciting is this?! No matter what the outcome, this election is going to be a history making event and I cannot wait to be a part of it.

I'm not here to share my political views, but I do want to make sure everybody is going to let their ballot be counted because we all know that EVERY vote matters.

This will be the fifth election that I have been able to vote in and I'm sort of proud of myself for being able to say so. I had only been 18 for three months in my first election back in '92 and my mom even came to the high school to pick me up at lunch so we could go together. (Please stop doing the math in your head!).

I felt SO good about myself when I walked out of the library after voting that day, but I'm not sure how to explain it - do you know what I'm talking about? We can breath a huge sigh of relief for being able to live in a democracy where our voices are heard and our freedom is so important not only to ourselves, but the people who come in to our country and worked hard to get here - all for a better life.

In '96 while attending college, I was so proud of my 'I Voted Today' sticker and I kept it on my favorite notebook so I could look at it every day. However, I didn't know that you could ONLY vote for the president on your ballot - I thought you had to vote for everything on there. I didn't know any of the other names for judges, sheriffs, and whoever else was on there, so I made a cute little pattern with my bubbles. Probably not the best approach, but it seemed logical as a 20 something...

I drove through an icy/rain mixture in 2000 to find a little elementary school for my next voting stint - and it was the first time that my roommate and I had watched every debate and I knew without a doubt who I was voting for - I nearly body checked a little lady into the wall trying to get in to my booth because I was so excited. I wondered if being that excited was 'normal'?

'04 seemed uneventful because I walked across the street to the fire station and the volunteers in there were rude...I didn't feel quite as upbeat when I left, but it didn't seem to matter, either.

This year will mark a point in history where we will be able to tell our kids and grandkids what this was like to experience in the near future and all I can encourage you to do is VOTE, VOTE, VOTE!!

If Only...

2008-10-13T20:50:00.000-07:00

I had some extra money - I would buy this bad boy and drive it proudly with my matching window flags blowing into the black and gold sunset....maybe put some sweet hub caps on it, too.

Ahhhh....

2008-10-03T18:08:00.000-07:00

The first rain of the season came this afternoon and what a welcome change!

When I left for work this morning, I took a few pictures of the sunrise coming up over the hill - it was brilliant and of course, pictures don't justify the colors.

The rest of the afternoon was spent watching the radar anticipating the big blob of green heading our way.... everybody was so excited and I'd be lying if I said that I wasn't too! I mean, it's the first rain we've had since February - that's right, seven months.

Day after day it's nothing but blue skies and sun - it's dry, dusty, and up until last weekend, it's been 100F - hello, I'm ready for fall already!

As I'm sitting here with the patio door open taking in deep breaths of fresh air and feeling the cool breeze, it makes me want to curl up in a blanket, drink hot chocolate, and watch football. Ahhh....

I have the BEST Friends in the Whole Wide World!

2008-09-23T17:50:00.000-07:00

I'm absolutely, positively, 100% in utter shock right now... and that seems to be an understatement!

For the last two months, I have been under a cloud of worry and fear that I would miss spending time with my family at Christmas... I have struggled with the thought of putting a flight on my credit card, but decided to buck up last week and just DO IT... no matter how long it would take for me to pay it off, the time spent in Iowa would be well worth the monthly payments (right?).

I went into the weekend pretty excited about the thought of being home for the holiday, but then I started to wrangle with questions again - how much overtime will I need to put in to pay this off? Should I have really done that right now? What if prices would have dropped? WHAT HAVE I DONE?!

Well, let me tell you something about the friends and family that I have - they've all heard my sob story and patiently listened while I've talked, emailed, and cried about the thought of being alone on Christmas. And these same friends have lifted me up today in a small UPS envelope containing the money I would need to fly home to be with my family!! (I'm still in shock!)

Missy has had me fooled this whole time thinking that she was sending me pictures of her little one, asking that I 'document' my reaction - so, I humored her as you'll see below.

The arrival

See, I got the card!

I see the check, and am thinking, "What the??"

Let the tears begin...

The card and check

I love you guys :)

So I'm on the phone with Missy this entire time and am having a hard time comprehending what is happening (meaning that I'm more concerned that I didn't get the picture!). She begins to tell me how April and Kerry really helped spear head this task and how much people really wanted to help me out, the outpouring of love that has been shown, and seriously, how I have the BEST friends in the whole wide world! God answered my prayers far beyond what I thought (even though I sort of jumped the gun - it's so hard when the answer is to 'wait'!)

I'm truly amazed and so blessed by you - friends and family that have helped me and loved me unconditionally. Thank you for your generosity, love, and heartfelt caring of a friend... I don't even know how to begin to thank those of you who donated, but from the bottom of my heart and to the depths of the ocean.... thank you, thank you, thank you!

Randomness

2008-09-20T18:06:00.000-07:00

This week marked 18 months of living in sunny California. Time feels like it flies one minute, but the next it seems like it's crawling at a snail's pace.

With this year and a half 'anniversary' comes that bitter taste of homesickness....again. I think I'm figuring it out that it happens about every quarter. It's been three months since my last visit home and three more to go until Christmas, so at least I've hit the downward slide of my next vacation back to Iowa.

And the good news is - I WILL be able to head home for the holidays! I have been consumed with the fear of not being able to travel due to the high prices of plane tickets, but just for fun, I went online to do some more checking yesterday and the same flight that I was looking into a couple months ago has went down $200!! I grabbed my credit card and made my flight arrangements then and there - I'm sooo happy! It's obviously still more than I'd like to pay for a plane ticket, but I don't see anything changing in the near future that will give us back the luxury of being able to fly when and where we want for a cheap price tag anymore. Yay for me!

My bible group started up again Tuesday night at church and I was so excited to get back into the swing of things. This last study I did called 'Experiencing God' really kicked it in gear for me and I couldn't have been more excited with the things that were happening while taking the class. We're back in the church auditorium studying the Beatitudes, however I spent too much time gawking around the room to see who all was there, who came back, and who was a new attendee to really listen to what was going on with the first lecture. And I thought my brother had attention problems.

While I was scanning the room, I realized that I had a lot of friends there. People I had gotten to know over the last year and friends that I enjoy seeing. I thought about how hard it would be to leave them if I ever decided to move away from here. Never as hard as my peeps back home though.

Speaking of which, last night my friend, Michelle invited me to her sons' school for a family movie night. We watched Mr. Magorium's Wonder Emporium, had free popcorn and $1 nachos. I loved it! It was outside under the stars and it was cool enough that we needed a blanket and sweatshirts... she has such a great family and I love hanging out with her and her husband and kids! I think it's the Midwest factor that binds us so closely since she's from Illinois :)

Yesterday at work a committee organized some activities to celebrate National Talk Like a Pirate Day (that's for real). I thought it was a lot of fun! And since my brother has teased me the last three weeks about having a scar on my face that looks like I got into a 'hook fight', I felt like I really fit in by saying, 'AAARRRR'! We got to take a swing at a treasure chest pinata, get pirate tattoos, do a ring toss, bean bag toss, and then stop at the bar for some Pirate's Booty (puffed corn), drinks, and a prize - the guys I went with both won gift certificates and lottery tickets, but I had the mentality of a little kid and picked up the heavier gift bags thinking that those were the better prizes. I won a small pirate beach ball and a rubber/bendy pirate.

The scar on my face is healing a little more, but of course I still think it looks hideous. I have to remind myself that it's only been 3 weeks and I still have ten stitches underneath of the scar that are still trying to heal themselves. I had to stop using the ointment because I had an allergic reaction to it and broke out in hives all around the incision - not only was it red, bumpy, and swollen, but it was greased up and itchy! Totally hot. Now I'm just using lotion on it to keep it from drying out - which was happening because being the doctoral genius that I am, I was putting peroxide on it to keep it clean. Little did I know how much I was making things worse. At least I'm on the mend from what I can see!

Today I had my first 'bad' experience at the salon. I thought I would get some low lights put in my super blond hair to tone things down a little bit for the autumn months, but I came out of the salon as a brunette. Now mind you, last year I did dye my hair brown for winter, but I wasn't a big fan of the au naturale and back to blond I went a few months later. Last year I was expecting to be brunette, but today I wasn't. It was the first time (ever) that I didn't tell the stylist that I liked what she did - and though I tried to be polite, I wanted to cry. I hate it. She was going to charge me extra for the few highlights that she did put in and I said, 'Really? Because I'm not too happy with how things turned out." So she didn't. Then she sent me a text on my way home letting me know how bad she felt and that she would give me $10 off of my next service. Bless her heart... but now I'm wrestling with the whole thought of how I don't even want to go back, but this girl is SOOOO nice and sweet. And pregnant. I think I'd be kind of a jerk if I didn't go back again for one mistake? Who knows. I just hope this color fades quickly.

Time to see if I can catch the Cyclones in action as they take on UNLV - I wanted to go to Vegas SO bad to see my friends and hang out for the game this weekend, but taking the time off and money didn't allow for it - maybe next year?! ISU, ISU, ISU..

Rivalry

2008-09-13T11:59:00.001-07:00

I was so excited to get up and watch ISU v. Iowa this morning at 9am. I even planned my morning around it. And guess who couldn't watch it because of the network? That's right...yours truly.

I was incredibly bummed out and I think my roommate wanted to make fun of me, but the look on my face spoke volumes. So nothing was said other than, 'Good luck.'

And now that the better team couldn't pull through, I'm glad I went about my Saturday routine as usual. There's always next year.

Sifting

2008-09-12T17:42:00.000-07:00

Dictionary results for: sift

1. to separate and retain the coarse parts with a sieve.
2. to examine

3. to question closely

I had an interesting email chat with a dear friend of mine the other day. It was one of those conversations that continuously replays in my mind on a subject that I began to pray for a couple months back, but then it came to a head at the right moment with her loving and reaffirming words.

I'm a girl. I talk to other girl-friends about my emotions, how i'm feeling during a particular time, my life's happenings, my relationships, my struggles, dreams, thoughts, etc. and it's SO easy because they can all relate. We're women - we're wired differently than men. Period.

However, when I get into relationships with men, I feel like I'm incapable of expressing these emotions because I'm afraid I'm going to get rejected, put down, or laughed at (which have all three happened at one point or another in my years of dating experiences!). Plus, I think I've taken "Above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life" (Proverbs 4:23) to a whole new level when I do get into a relationship!

Anyway, she brought up a fabulous point about 'sifting'. I began to think of my past relationships as a panning for gold (the future Mr. of my life being the piece of gold). And granted, I know it's referred to as 'panning' for gold, but humor me for a minute while I 'sift'...

When you sift for gold, a person would place the ore in a large metal or plastic pan, with water, and agitate it so that the gold particles would settle to the bottom. The sand, mud and gravel would be washed over the side of the pan, leaving the gold behind.

I have my own version of God putting me in this nice, big pan called life and helping me sift out the sand, mud or muck that is going on around me in order to find that one piece of gold. And right now, I'm so cool with letting Him do all of the work.

Ironically, I ran over this passage in Judges 7:4 :

But the LORD said to Gideon, "There are still too many men. Take them down to the water, and I will sift them for you there. If I say, 'This one shall go with you,' he shall go; but if I say, 'This one shall not go with you,' he shall not go."

Granted, this is an excerpt taken out of context (Gideon was to take over the Midianites and God was sifting out the men who feared the Lord), but I still thought it was ironic...

In the past, my friends have always teased me about my dating processes - it has always been Feast or Famine. When there is one who is asking me out, there are three more on his heels... but when there are none - seriously, I hear crickets...

THAT has been my prayer the last few months; for God to continue to sift through the people that I meet (though that sounds a bit impersonal). I don't want to get tangled up in a web of dating that leads to another tear-jerker of a break up. I don't want to meet families and friends if 'he' isn't the one that God has specifically picked out for me. I don't want to take anything away from the future Mr. by giving away pieces of my heart for 'free' because I'm too stubborn to wait for His best.

I want to be with somebody who honors and respects me, somebody who also has positive people in their lives that raise them up as a person and a friend, somebody who can accept my vices and virtues... and for me to be able to do the same for him...

I want God's best for me. And I will wait for His best because I am worth His best.

Dorrks

2008-09-10T17:05:00.000-07:00

The 'k' is silent.

Last night my uncle, Kim, and his coworker, K.C. were able to meet up with me at BJ's for some good food, great conversation, and da-da-daaaaaa - a pizookie!!

It was so awesome getting to see a familiar face and more importantly, being with family.
We had a lot of catching up to do since the last time we have seen each other was Christmas of last year. I always enjoy hearing stories about my cousins who are still in school and what's going on back home, too.

Quite a few years ago, maybe around '94 or '95, Kim and Lesli, were back visiting from Ohio and came to my dorm at ISU to pick me up, hang out, eat, and do some shopping at the mall.

Remember the time frame - I'm in stylish bib overalls and a jean jacket - my cousin, Kyle (who is now just shy of 18) was probably 5 or so and while I'm walking ahead of him, he asked, 'Who is that Blue Girl?' hee hee...that story still makes me giggle...

The nickname has stuck and I will forever be known as Blue Girl to both Kyle and Kaley!

Kim - thanks for spending the evening with me, for supper, the laughs, and sincere hugs ~ it was much appreciated!

Uncle and Blue Girl

Personality Test

2008-09-10T17:00:00.001-07:00

Dipna gave me a personality test to take the other day and I think this is pretty true of me - what do you think??

I'm a Guardian.

Guardians are the cornerstone of society, for they are the temperament given to serving and preserving our most important social institutions. Guardians have natural talent in managing goods and services--from supervision to maintenance and supply -- and they use all their skills to keep things running smoothly in their families, communities, schools, churches, hospitals, and businesses.

Guardians can have a lot of fun with their friends, but they are quite serious about their duties and responsibilities. Guardians take pride in being dependable and trustworthy; if there's a job to be done, they can be counted on to put their shoulder to the wheel. Guardians also believe in law and order, and sometimes worry that respect for authority, even a fundamental sense of right and wrong, is being lost. Perhaps this is why Guardians honor customs and traditions so strongly -- they are familiar patterns that help bring stability to our modern, fast-paced world.

Practical and down-to-earth, Guardians believe in following the rules and cooperating with others. They are not very comfortable winging it or blazing new trails; working steadily within the system is the Guardian way, for in the long run loyalty, discipline, and teamwork get the job done right. Guardians are meticulous about schedules and have a sharp eye for proper procedures. They are cautious about change, even though they know that change can be healthy for an institution. Better to go slowly, they say, and look before you leap.

Guardians make up as much as 40 to 45 percent of the population, and a good thing, because they usually end up doing all the indispensable but thankless jobs everyone else takes for granted.

As a Guardian, you enjoy working as a valued member of a team, whether you are leading it or following a credible leader. You like to work with people who carry their weight. You appreciate having clear-cut responsibilities and being recognized for your dedication and achievements. Your natural traits are those that employers have traditionally valued - and that successful companies still respect. You are responsible and loyal to an organization once you've signed on.

In any environment, including your work place, you are usually focused on making people happy and facilitating harmonious relationships. You often lend "aid and comfort" by drawing on a combination of tradition, past experience, and the direction of established authority. In your ideal job, people would give of themselves and work toward the good of the group.

Here's the link if you want to see your own personality results:

http://keirsey.com/sorter/register.aspx

Update

2008-09-08T09:07:00.000-07:00

Benign.

Best word I could have heard all morning! The dermatologist just called to let me know that my patch of freckles were benign, but had some atypical cells under the microscope... his words, "It's a good thing you watched it and caught it this early - we might not have had as good of results if you waited much longer."

What a relief!

Thank you for all of your prayers and concern the last 10 days I've been anxsiously awaiting the results.

Dreamer

2008-09-07T13:00:00.000-07:00

I'm a dreamer.

I think I have always been a dreamer with a great imagination to go along with it. I love dreaming about the 'what ifs' in life, where I'm going to be in the future, and what the next chapter of my life will hold.

My actual dreams when I'm sleeping are usually very vivid, full of color, they contain story lines, conversations with people, and meaning. I've had the opportunity to pass a few of my dreams along one of my friends who will, in turn, analyze them and let me know what God may be trying to reveal to me. She has been attending a dream seminar for the past few years with another friend and I wish I could join them because I am fascinated by what tales I can come up with in my sleep!

The dreams meanings that I have received from her are usually right on the head of what is going on in my life at this particular time or stage and I'm so intrigued. By no means and I'm relying on my dreams to give me any 'answers' or let me 'see' in to the future, but I just think it's cool that God does work in our dreams as much as He does.

Before I moved away, my mom gave me a cool wooden plaque that I usually look at every day before I walk out the door.

It says: Go confidently in the direction of your dreams. Live the life you have imagined. - Henry David Thoreau

How true and meaningful that has become for me in the last year and a half! I am living the life that I had imagined and dreamed about, but with a few unexpected twists and turns along the way! God gave me the confidence to step out in the directions of my dreams and I am so glad that I did...

For about the last six months I've been obsessed with a singing artist named Duffy... I love her voice and the meaning behind her lyrics. I've attached her song called Distant Dreamer and it always reminds me of myself and how I continue to dream about the distant (and near) future! Who knows what's around the corner, but it's always fun to dream about...

Pure

2008-09-01T17:01:00.001-07:00

Unremembered and afar,

I watched you as I watched a star,

Through darkness struggling into view,

And loved you

better than you knew.

- Elizabeth Akers Allen

If I would have known then....

2008-08-31T12:10:00.000-07:00

Being a life long sun worshipper, I've begun to notice a lot of changes taking place on my body - in a not so good sort of way...

In the last 14 years, I've had several moles removed and imperfections looked at by the dermatologist at my annual 'skin exams' and this year was no different. However, my new doctor decided he didn't like the look of this cluster of freckles I've always had on my right cheek. They were wispy, different colors, and different shapes. If you know your ABC's of moles, (Assymetrical, Border, Color) I knew that this needed to go - which is what I had done Friday morning.

Before

I thought it was going to be scraped off, but since I've had it for so long, he had to cut it out. He made a diamond shape on my cheek and gave me two layers of stitches - 10 on the bottom and 10 on the top. All will dissolve on their own, but the bottom (inside) layer will take 3 months and I'll have a bump under my skin until then. I should find out by the end of this week if it's benign or malignant melanoma....hopefully it's nothing though...

Seeing my incision for the first time at the office, I burst into tears - literally. It was standing straight up like the stitching in your jeans and it was a funky color. My cheek was swollen all day like a little melon and I had a hard time smiling or laughing. My roommate was nice enough to go get me some extra strength Tylenol and antibiotic ointment once I got home and then Dipna stopped by with ice cream after work - everything is cured with mint chocolate chip :)

As of today, the swelling has gone down and there is just a little bit of bruising, but nothing too major. I have to keep telling myself that I'd rather have this little cut and scar on my face rather than going through chemo in the future because I wasn't proactive now.

Two days later

And another little interesting sun fact, I now have a thing in the corner of my eye that looks like yellow chicken fat that is caused by UV rays - I guess it's very common, but just another reason that I feel like a fool for laying out and using tanning beds as often as I did.

I think I've learned my lesson.

Santa Monica

2008-08-26T15:32:00.000-07:00

I love the ocean and I especially love Santa Monica... I was able to fly down on Friday for the weekend to spend time with my cousin, hang out, do some sight seeing, and eat out way too much!

My plane landed around 3 and I finally got to our hotel around 4 with traffic. I should have known it was going to be an 'interesting' long weekend when I stepped into the first taxi. The driver was nice enough and had some classical music playing and asked if I liked this or if I would rather listen to some 'hard rock music'. I was like, 'Uh, this is fine - it's your car, listen to what YOU want and I'll be ok!' (Secretly hoping he would put in some Coldplay.) Let me just tell you, he cranked up the classical so loud that my eardrum was literally crackling and I kept having to plug my right ear because I swore it was bleeding and my eyeball was watering...seriously...

While we're stuck in traffic, he decides to switch cd's and put in some very, very sappy love music - and he was singing. It was like a compilation cd with Mariah Carey, Mark Anthony, Celine, and whoever else that could belt out a melody with such emotion and longing to be in somebody's arms....by then I just wanted HIM to hold me! ha ha...

$77 later, I arrived at the hotel - yeah, no kidding. I was told that Burbank would have been a good place to fly in if I were staying in Marina del Rey - well, if I should do this again, I will know that isn't the case and shame on me for not checking out Mapquest first. Oh well. On my way out of the car, I hit my thigh on something - no idea what it was, but it swelled up bigger than a half dollar and I ended up laying on the bed with an ice pack on my thigh trying to get the swelling down. Is this what happens to your body when you turn 34??

I got freshened up and headed to Santa Monica to meet Tristan and her coworker Jeff at his hotel. This time, I got the Coked Out Cabbie. All he did was sniff, sniff, sniff, wipe his nose in a very quick fashion and take the palm of his hand and hit the tip of his nose - like it was going to 'honk' or something. I'm just wondering if we were going to make it there safely or at all! Somebody cut in front of us and ended up getting hit in the opposite lane of traffic, but we kept on going - didn't see it, but heard it and knew it had to have been that guy who was in such a big toot. He dropped me off at the hotel and I forgot that there was a step in the mini van for me to get out of my chair and in one fluid motion, I opened the door and fall out of the cab - for real. People are staring at me and I jump up like nothing happened and threw him my wad of cash. He was all concerned and asking if I was ok, but I was gone... pride and all...

Finally - I'm so excited to see Tristan! She came down to pick me up in the lobby and to head back up to their room. Talk about a genuine person... she is so sweet and I have missed being around her this past year and a half. She had lived with me in my one bedroom apt. three years ago and I just loved having her there, camping out on my couch, going out with me, and spending time together laying out, watching tv, or whatever...

Once they got ready, we headed over to the 3rd Street Promenade, which is an outdoor shopping area with live entertainment along the strip and places to eat. We were starving and decided to stop in and eat at Johnny Rockets then headed out for some quick shopping, people watching, and a Jamba Juice! We were pooped out by the time we got done and headed back to the hotel around 10, hung out with Jeff for a while, then we left for our beds... so nice to lay down!

Saturday morning we got up early and headed over to Hollywood to see the big hillside sign, geek at the Walk of the Stars, look at the Kodak Theatre and Chinese Theatre. And guess what? We had the Coked Out Cabbie again!! Fun times...Anyway, we had some brunch at Mel's Diner and then started our 'tour'. It's so dirty down there - old gum stuck to the sidewalks, litter, wrappers, and just filth...it's pretty gross if you ask me. We took a lot of pictures, shopped a little, and did more walking... I had been there before, so it was fun to see her reaction and how she interpreted the scenery. We bounced back to the hotel so she could get some afternoon sun and decided we would walk over to the ocean. Bad choice - we got about 3 blocks with our map and turned around and went back to the hotel pool. We would have had quite the haul if we decided to stick to our route! I sat in the shade most of the time and enjoyed watching the kids playing in the pool.

Once we were done at the pool, we went up to Santa Monica to watch the sun set over the ocean, take some pictures and eat at Sushi Roku. It was her first time eating 'real' sushi and we both loved what we ordered! We headed down to the pier to walk along the beach, step in the water and take some more pictures... it was so funny because we were just walking along with our pants rolled up and all of a sudden, we hear this roar of a wave and the water came so fast and drenched our legs and jeans - I was wet up to my knees and walked around pretty chilly the rest of the night! It was worth it though...the smell, the sound, the view - you can't beat it.

Next on the agenda was to hit the Santa Monica Pier. We were really hungry for something sweet, so Tristan was on the hunt down for a funnel cake and guess what I wanted? Dippin' Dots! Low and behold, there was a Dippin' Dots stand right next to the funnel cakes! We were in heaven... I tried the S'Mores ice cream, but decided that nothing beats the mint chocolate. It was still good though. We did a lot of walking around and just hanging out at the pier and then headed back to the hotel around 9 - it was a long day. Sunday we got up and had breakfast in the hotel dining area and then got all packed up and ready for our flights to leave. I took off around noon and you know who took me to the airport - that's right, the COC - he said that he actually 'recognized' me from hauling us around L.A. three different times. I mean seriously, there is a SLEW of taxis parked outside of the hotel and what are the chances that I would end up with him?? Guess it was fate. Or something like that.

My flight was delayed an hour, so I bought a magazine and a bag of Skittles. Once the previous flight had boarded, I put my magazine and candy on my chair and walked over to the window to look outside - I wasn't even gone for 2 minutes - I turned around and my stuff was gone. Hello, this isn't like home when women would leave their purses with me while they ran into the restroom one last time before boarding. There I sat with nothing to do but people watch.

Once on the plane, I sat next to a minor who stared at me the entire time. She told me she was in 6th grade, lived in Folsom, and her mom had a surprise for her at the airport. She liked my shirt, told me that her mom was born in Little Rock and proceeded to eat everything in sight. She even had pretzels in her bag from previous flights that she had been stock piling! I was kind of jealous.

She pulls her carry on bag from under the seat and starts digging around, but something caught me out of the corner of my eye and I glanced over at her right as she shoved something back into her bag. Then she stared at me some more. She pulled out a dark t-shirt that had hot pink silly putty (that looked like gum) allllll over - inside the bag, on her clothes, in her pencils, erasers, etc. You name it, it was pink. The stuff had melted, so it was not only oily, but stringy. I helped her try to clean it up as best as I could and she said, "Wow, I'm glad this isn't my bag. It's my mom's." I laughed thinking of what a nice surprise mom was going to have when she saw this mess!! She ended up throwing it away when the flight attendant walked by and I told her it was probably a good idea :)

All in all, it was a GREAT trip and I'm so glad that I got to spend time in SoCal again - I love it down there... and especially my time with Trist.... but I was glad to be back home!

My Other Love

2008-08-20T21:13:00.000-07:00

This afternoon I had a former coworker email me about something in the skywalk that I wouldn't believe - and I didn't until I got the proof in a picture!

How awesome is this? A Dippin' Dots machine!!!

It's always nice to know that your friends remember little tid bits about your likes/dislikes and are reminded of you miles away.... if only I were there to purchase a little bowl of mint chocolate - I love the ice cream of the future.

Birfday

2008-08-14T10:30:00.000-07:00

Today I've decided that 34 is the 'new' 22 ... I feel good, God has blessed this past year for me, I have my awesome family, great friends, and good health... so today I'm going to celebrate ME!

Last night I made a strawberry Jell-O cake for my coworkers and I can't wait to bust it out. My sister in law makes the best Jell-O cake for me, though - I think it's because the pieces are SO huge and she puts actual strawberries on top. I think we (Todd, Evonn, and I) ate an entire cake in two days when I used to live with them. Ahhh, good times....

Tonight some friends are taking me out to eat after work, but it sounds like work is ending around 3 or 3:30! Why not? It's my birfday.

It's a little odd to think that I'll be celebrating with a whole 'new' group of friends when I've always been used to my 'lifelong' friends being there for me. Change is good - it doesn't mean that I don't want to be with the 'regulars', but this goes hand in hand with the endless 'new' chapters that keep opening up in my life. At least I know that someday I'll look back on this 34th year and know where I was in life, what brought me to this point, and reminisce about how each person truly meant something during this season for me.

I wonder if I can use any more quotation marks? I seemed to have 'overdone' it in that last paragraph... sigh...

So here's to ME - branching out, celebrating life, love, friendships, and new beginnings...

And seriously, a heartfelt thank you to each person who has walked through this last year with me! I couldn't have done it without your support, encouragement, and prayers...

You say it's your birthday...nanananana...it's my birthday too YEAH!

Olympic Fever

2008-08-11T19:32:00.000-07:00

I love the Olympics.

I love the competitions, I loved the ceremonies, I love how humble the athletes are when they win or even when they lose. So many years of hard work to be put to the test in front of millions of people to BE the best of the best... what an accomplishment for these individuals!

But I can't lie...the (real) reason that I get so excited for the Olympics is to watch my Olympic-Crush, Steven Lopez. Meow.

Steven is a welterweight Tae Kwon Do two time gold medalist and now he's in Beijing competing alongside his younger sister and brother while their older brother is their coach. Talk about a family affair!

I had the nerve wracking opportunity to meet Hottie Hotterson a couple years ago when he was in Des Moines giving a seminar at one of the tae kwon do schools where my brother works. Todd called to let me know that he was in town and suggested that I come down to 'check him out' - I wasn't sure who he was at the time, but THEN found out that he was voted as one of People magazine's Sexiest Bachelors, I was totally there... and totally smitten.

Todd took this picture of the two of us and I didn't want to let his sweaty, rock hard body go. I was so nervous and can't even remember what I muttered to him when I walked over there, but I'm sure it wasn't too profound. I do remember him telling me that I had 'muscular shoulders' and then I probably wanted to blurt out how white our kids' teeth would be or something intelligent like that... I realized I am one of those people who definitely gets star struck and I cannot play it cool.

Needless to say, I'm pretty stoked to watch him fight next week! Hopefully he won't get kicked in his pretty face...

Happy Birthday, Louie!

2008-08-06T17:24:00.001-07:00

HAPPY Birthday to you,
Happy BIRTHDAY to you,
Happy Birthday DEAR daa-aad,
Happy birthday to YOU!

I hope you had a great 63rd birthday, Louie! Been thinking about you all day and hope you had a great time at Chicago Speak Easy with everybody - I'm sure it was fun spending time together....wish I were there with you!

Know that you're in my thoughts and prayers and that I love you very much! Be blessed as you begin another new year~

Celebrate

2008-08-06T17:14:00.001-07:00

Ok, I can't get this out of my mind and keep laughing every time I think of it.

Last night I was watching a rerun of 'Friends' and one of my favorite endings came on... (I'm already giggling again).

Ross wants to play the song 'Celebrate' on his bagpipes for Chandler and Monica's wedding...

Fun Fest

2008-07-30T19:05:00.000-07:00

Today our office shut down at 1pm so we could all go outside and enjoy some team activities - I had the best time with my team and it was all so much fun!

My team was called the El Dorado Hill 'Billies' and our team chant was:

Well I know that we ain't pretty,

But we're the best in this here city,

We'll take that reward if you please,

We're the El Dorado Hill Billies - YEE HAW!

Our attire consisted of straw hats, bandanas, a piece of straw (but it was actually lavendar), and as you can see, I fit the part with my Completely Cornfed t-shirt from Iowa!

Dipna (of the Krazie 8's) and Marcie (El Dorado Hill Billy)

Front: Dustin, Kam, Me

Back: Clint, Tres, Doug, Kevin, Tracie, Rian

For starters, the organizers had the Back 40 come in and cater our lunch for us, which consisted of chicken, a beef bisque (I think), potato salad, baked beans, and salad. It was super yummy...

The first event that was held was a hot dog eating competition. My teammate, Tres, was voted to do this since he was out of the office the day we had our team meeting :) I, however, was his back up... thank goodness he pulled through! I think it was a tie for 2nd place, but he got bumped to 3rd place... bummer...

Tres man handling the hot dogs

Shayne, Garnto (The winner), Jeff, and Bert

Second in events was a group balloon toss - those things always make me nervie for some reason. And true to my form, I had to toss it to Veronica and in mid-air it turned all long and lop-sided and splattered all over the tennis court. A bunch of people got knocked out at the same time as we did, so I didn't feel quite so sucky.

The third event was the 3 legged sack race, which Kam and I did together - we could not get coordinated and she even tried to carry me during our 'practice' time! Luckily, we had to run bases at the ball field, so we just went from home plate to first and handed it off to the next couple on our team - who by the way, made up for the time we lost!

Fourth was the bat-n-beer (root beer by the way) race, which I was 'lucky' enough to participate in. I thought I had a good plan in my head of how I was going to do it, but it went straight out the window once I went around the bat about 4 times. I swear, the guy keeping track of our 10 turns kept saying '7' over and over! At one point I even shut one of my eyes because I always thought that 'helped' when I was drunk! It didn't... I spent most of my time in the sand fumbling around and after the 10th turn, I was handed a cup of root beer to guzzle - needless to say, I decided to just dump it on my face and make up some time... but trying to run back was a feat and I ended up stumbling and crawling over the line to tag my next partner.

Justin spinning

Dina drinking after spinning

The last line of events was the dunk tank. We got to select somebody to dunk and most of the people were upper management and a couple other guys who were good sports... I never did get to throw the ball, which I'm ok with now. It made me think back to last month when my nephew made fun of how I threw the ball when we were playing catch (ok, I was catching and he was chasing) and I decided that if an 8 year old was making fun of how I threw, at least my coworkers wouldn't be joining in! See, hindsight is 20/20...

Dipna and Me - too cool for the dunk tank

Once the dunk tank was done, awards were handed out and guess what? The Hill Billies took 2nd place!! That's right, baby... we got gift certificates to a place in town and a nice silver medal that our team captain claimed!

We're 4th from the bottom - 2nd place!

Kevin and his Daisy Dukes taking 2nd Place for the team

The weather was great, the food was good, and the atmosphere was in high spirits - I wish we could do this every day....

FREE!!

2008-07-30T08:48:00.000-07:00

I'm reaching out to the masses here... my friends, Shonda and Theron, sent me this email and hopefully you can help out:

As some of you may or may not know; Theron and I have 2 boxers; Roxie is a reverse brindle (with papers) and approximately 2 years old (she's a smaller boxer too; only about 55-60 lbs.). She is also fixed. She had a litter of puppies at an early age and then we had her fixed.

Roxie and Jesse (our other boxer that is about 90 lbs.) just feed off each other and they both are starting to get aggressive with others that come in our yard. When one or the other are inside they seem to act FINE. Roxie is fully potty trained the ONLY criteria for getting her is that she stays an inside dog. Her shot are all updated and she's regularly groomed (to say the least she's a tampered princess) and we really don't want to get rid of her but it's just for the best. Roxie is extremely timid with others; she'll come to her owners but she takes a while to warm up. We have taken her to dog obedience (10-week training session) and she did a really good job. Walks great on a leash. We have an invisible fence collar if that interests you that we paid a couple hundred dollars for (you can have for free).

Since we've moved to the farm we have a LOT more people in and out with the horses and I just can't have my dogs aggressive. Anyone who knew Jesse before Roxie entered the picture knows that he use to be the sweetest dog ever; now's he's just extremely protective and it's more when Roxie is around him.

Anyway, PLEASE HELP US FIND A GREAT HOME FOR HER.

Thank you!

Wilderness

2008-07-26T21:39:00.000-07:00

Sorry I've been a little M.I.A. lately - I feel like I've been writing about some superficial topics, but I've really needed a chance to collect my thoughts and step back from this for a while. Thanks for letting me take a little break ~

What I have found is that some of you don't like to hear how things are REALLY going with me personally when I write out in the open like this ... it is, after all, an open diary! I have let you into some really emotional things that have happened, experiences that I have had, and thoughts that come across my mind.

(I'm not going to change how I've been expressing myself... I'm being honest with you and myself and I totally want you to see how God is working on refining me. Things like this aren't supposed to be a walk in the park and I need to be able to share myself with my friends and family - it's because you love me and I love you!)

What you do need to know, is that I'm fine - I really am - I think we all go on a bit of a roller coaster ride from time to time and we don't share these interpersonal feelings with one another, so when I do tell you about a situation, I get a lot of email feedback. Don't get me wrong, I love feedback and seeing comments, but you have to understand that this is an incredibly trying time for me, too.

My close friend and I describe what we're going through as a wilderness. When I was home last month and spoke to my pastor, he even stated that when I do come out of this wilderness that I'm in, that I will be able to turn around and finally see the trees - each one will represent a specific time, place, situation, or experience and I'll be able to see the wilderness as a whole - but through the trees. At this point, I wish I could chop a couple of those trees down.

For those of you who have asked, yes, I have come out of my Post-Iowa Funk after visiting last month. It lasted a lot longer that I had anticipated, but I've finally gotten back into the swing of things with work, church, and personal things that needed to be addressed. My mind had been clouded emotionally for too long and that veil is being lifted... I feel a sense of peace with a couple of decisions that had to be made and a huge weight has been lifted off of my shoulders just in this past week.

I went out with some friends last night and while we were talking, I thought about how God brought us together. Isn't it ironic that a year and a half ago, I was so worried about moving because I wouldn't know anybody? And here I was, in the middle of a group of 10 strangers, sharing my life - but they're my friends now - I felt safe with them. While we were out, I had another friend from church texting me asking me to come spend time with her and her boys at the drive-in... what? I'm getting invited places?! Who would have thought? By no means is this journey I'm on over, but I am seeing the true heart and intentions of people that I've become to know while being here.

The same is true for my bible study group that meets on Tuesday nights. I've said it before and I'll say it again, I love these ladies - we marvel at God's perfect timing and the structure that He has just for us. You have me (an Iowa hay seed), our group leader is from Nebraska, another woman is from Ohio, my friend from Illinois, and another woman from New Jersey, all sitting around the same table in California learning about the 'Experience of God' and capitalizing on our new found relationship with one another. Seriously, how cool is that?! He brought us together for a perfect reason and I'd like to humanly try to figure it out and say it's because they're all like a 'mom' to me, but I believe it's much deeper than that... we are all learning something new from one another and it is so awesome.

I even chuckled today as I met up with a new friend down in Elk Grove early this morning. While we were at this place talking, an old coworker of mine came in - somewhere WAY out of the way for me (and for her as well), but here I am in this HUGE state and I'm seeing people that I know! I didn't leave until early afternoon and on the drive back up to my place, I kept thinking to myself, "I'm living in California... I'm seeing people that I know in the most random places....and God totally has my back." Talk about comforting.

Changes are taking place and the trees are being shaken....

Coldplay

2008-07-22T17:17:00.000-07:00

For those of you who don't know me, Coldplay is by far, my most favorite band! Mind you, I like a lot of different kinds of music (except country), but as soon as I hear a song being sung by this group, a little sigh comes from within...ahhhh....

I had the chance to go to San Jose last Friday to see them in concert - for the third time - and it was their best show yet! They had an opening band called Picture Atlantic who had won a local contest to open the show and they were energetic, got the crowd excited, and were genuinely glad to be in the arena.

The second band that came out about put me to sleep... I have no idea what their name was - I thought it sounded like 'Shoes' and my friend thought it was 'Sugar' something... either way, they were not good. When they announced that they were singing their last song, the crowd erupted in cheers!

Finally, Coldplay came out at 9:15 and played until 11 or a little after - and nonstop! The BEST part of the whole show was when they ran through the crowd on the floor and up in to the stands where we were sitting - maybe 2 rows in front of us! All I kept saying was, 'I Can't Believe This!' I Can't Believe This!'

Yay! Coldplay!

I could see Chris Martin's SWEAT on his face :) Oh how I wish I could have ran down and hugged Gwenyth's husband! (sigh)

I think he was singing to me...

They sang all of my favorite songs, like 'Clocks', 'Yellow', 'Yes', and 'The Scientist', plus a lot of songs off of their new album... I'm still on cloud nine thinking about it!

Singing 'Yellow'

Viva La Vida Tour
During the day, we went to Santa Cruz to spend a few hours looking at the ocean off of the pier, walking the boardwalk, which by the way, is not made out of boards. Am I the only person who didn't know this?? I can honestly say that I was incredibly bummed out that it wasn't made out of boards... and I thought it would be longer... regardless, it was fun having ice cream, riding on the sky lift, and overlooking the beach and ocean/Monterrey Bay. I love the ocean.

The pier

The Boardwalk from the sky lift

Ocean waves

All in all, it was a beautiful day outside and the night was even better listening to the best band EVER!!

Father Knows Best

2008-07-12T20:38:00.001-07:00

Mmmm....chocolate.....

For one of the first times in my life, I'm taking my dad's advice.

He has two pieces of Dove Dark Chocolate per day - it's for medicinal purposes, really...

But now I'm hooked - only because I'm addicted to chocolate.

Seriously, what a great excuse...antioxidents, reduces blood clotting, and it's heart healthy!

I love Dove. And Dove loves me.

Benefit

2008-07-12T19:24:00.000-07:00

While I was on vacation in Iowa last month, I received an email from one of the women in my small group from church. It told us that our small group leader, Kathi, had been hit by a drunk driver and she sustained life threatening injuries which included severe head trauma.

A lot of things go through your mind when you read something like this and my first thought was that she must have been driving somewhere late at night.

Unfortunately, she was on her bicycle training for a bike race that is taking place this very weekend and it was at 10:30 in the morning! That's right, in the morning... her and one of her friends, Kathy, were in training and were struck by a young woman who had leaned over to pick up her water bottle and drifted in to the bike lane.

It's such a sad story... here you think that you're going out for a couple hours worth of riding and then you don't come home.

Here is the link that was posted on the local news channel last month:

http://www.kcra.com/news/16667543/detail.html

A lot of healing has taken place since last month, but both women (and I should say the young woman who hit them, too) have been through so much since then. I couldn't imagine what would be going through her head, how her family is dealing with something like this, and what is going to happen to her in the upcoming trial.

On the flip side, you have two remarkable women who have been dealt a lot of physical injuries that will take months of rehabilitation and an even longer amount of time to pay off medical bills.

So tonight after church, my roommate and I went to Ernie's (a little cafe down the street from church) for a benefit that would give 50% of the proceeds towards these two women and their mounting bills. What a great cause! We had cheeseburgers, fries, and pop for a flat rate, but you could obviously give more to help out.

I love things like this... seeing people come out to help families in need. There is a small thread that connected all of us in that little room for a short period of time... a thread of love, a thread of giving, a thread of caring.

There was a gentleman taking pictures of everybody at their tables (Frank hates his picture being taken) to show the two women what was going on tonight once they are able to understand and grasp the magnitude of a stranger's love and what was going on in the "outside world". How awesome!

Here is a link to my friend's blog if you want to pray for her, see her progress, and read about how it all began... it's cool to see God answering SO many prayers and letting us be a part of their miracles. Each day gets better and there is so much hope in sight...

http://kathisturgeon.blogspot.com/

I didn't know the other Kathy, but 'our Kathi' always, always has a smile on her face and has such a great demeanor. One night I came in to small group with my Chicago Cubs t-shirt on and she came right over and wanted to know if I was from IL because nobody wears a Cubs t-shirt out here! We had a great talk about Iowa, our love for the Cubbies, how she moved out to Illinois and then came back to CA, etc. She is such a neat woman and I hope she can recover and move on from this quickly - I bet she'll have quite the stories to tell once she gets through all of this!

Please pray for all three women and their healing processes..

Smoke (cont.)

2008-07-09T18:20:00.000-07:00

This is ridiculous... the smoke is so intoxicating. Today was the first day I had a massive headache accompanied by a scratchy sore throat...and I'm blaming the smoke from the wildfires.

The last two weeks have been a roller coaster of smoke, "clear" skies, and back to smoke again. I would assume the news coverage of the fires surrounding us would be comparable to what I was seeing on tv about the floods when I was home visiting, but obviously on a different scale.

Here is a view off of our patio that I took at 6pm this evening.

And here is the view on a clear day - notice the round, flat water tower on top of the hill - you can barely see it in the picture above. That is between 3/4 to one mile away...

To top it off, today was a scorching 108F - AND the air conditioner at work was broken when everybody arrived this morning. You know when you expect to walk into an office and feel the blast of cool air? It was actually cooler (at 82F) outside this morning when I got to work at 7, than it was in the building. We shut the lights off on our side of the building and everybody had their little personal fans blowing. Too bad for me, I don't have a fan because 99.9% of the time, I'm freezing and wearing a sweater, but they soon got it fixed and we were getting cooled off around 10am. But still... it was hot.

I just hope we can catch a break from the heat and smoke here before long...this is getting tiring.

Hands Free

2008-07-08T17:51:00.000-07:00

This is hilarious - my friend in MI sent this to me today and I can't stop laughing...

In case you haven't heard, California passed a law on July 1st that you cannot be on your phone and driving at the same time, so a lot of people have acquired a Bluetooth in order to be 'hands free'. Which by the way, looks like a roach sucking on your ear, in my opinion.

Anyway, thanks for the clip, Big Daddy!

Relief

2008-06-28T13:18:00.000-07:00

Looks like we have a bit of relief in sight today. The smoke from the fires has been pretty intense the past week and this morning when I got up, I could actually see the hill off in the distance, thanks to a little breeze blowing in from the west.

It's been pretty gross out here and to know that you're breathing in the smoky air is so disgusting. We have had numerous advisories to stay indoors and keep your windows shut, but there are still those people who you see outside running, kids playing at the playgrounds, and women pushing strollers down the sidewalk... am I being overly sensitive to the pollutants?

I'm sorry, but when there is a doctor on the news at night talking about how pieces of ash could get lodged in your lung, I'd rather not take the chances - only because something like that would happen to ME! ha ha...

I think Wednesday and Thursday were the worst days so far.

First of all, the sun had already come up by the time I left for work, but it was a brilliant orange color with a pink perimeter. It was actually really beautiful, but weird that you could look right at it, too.

Second, when we walked outside to our car to go to lunch, the smell literally burned your nostrils and hurt your eyes. My contacts are all jacked up because of it - it's like there is a little film covering them. The smell like a camp fire that you can't get away from because it's constantly lingering.

Third, when we were coming back and taking the country road, there was about a mile to mile and a half of visibility and the smoke was literally rolling on the ground, like you would see fog doing on a fall morning. Creepy.

Here are a few pictures that I took either Monday or Tuesday on my way home from work... I can't remember. To know that it actually got worse than this is mind boggling... we need the rain that the midwest has been given too much of for the last few months!

The morning sun (too bad you can't see the vibrant colors)

Heading north on my way home

Western view

On Thursday you could barely see the outline of the hill from my apt. - here it just look hazy

Movie Shorts

2008-06-27T22:13:00.000-07:00

We went and saw Wall*E tonight after work and it was sooooo cute - I loved it.. well, I love little animated, feel-good movies anyway, but this was seriously too cute and probably made most adults (including myself) think about how we treat our Earth. I even teared up a couple of times...

The best part to some of these Pixar movies are the short takes beforehand. The clip tonight was called 'Presto'....I haven't laughed that hard in a LONG time! I didn't see any YouTube things out for it yet, but I'm including my other favorite short called 'Lifted' from the beginning of Ratatouille...equally funny :)

Follow Up

2008-06-26T17:28:00.001-07:00

Here are a few pictures from the 240 that I took while I was back home :)

Noah, Mady, Marcie, Joci

Auntie and Kids

Tough Guy

I'm so cute in my new dress

April, Reagan, Marcie, Missy, Carson

Marcie & Missy

Maverick, April, Marcie, Reagan

ISU Campus from the Memorial Union

Marcie & Amber, my college roommate

Marcie & Kathy, my manager from college

Homedog (Mike) and Nut Busta

Marcie & Mom - the sun, it burns my eyes

Birthday Girl with her doggie cake & candles

Dad & I on Father's Day after church

Mark & I golfing for the reunion

Amy & Jerry (The Cable Guy) - our golf partners

Addy & me in the horse barn

Jacie, Me, and Parker

Marcie & Mom

Dad and his 'girls'

April, Marcie, & Holly

Keegan hitting the ball

Marcie & Heidi

Tripped Out

2008-06-24T18:28:00.000-07:00

Whew! What a whirlwind 10 days I had at home last week. It was by far, the best trip I've had since becoming a "visitor"... and it was equally hard to leave.

It was great seeing green grass and green trees in Iowa - everything out here is burning up - flip on the TV and you'll see what I'm talking about. Today when I walked outside to go to lunch, my nose literally burned on the inside from the lingering smoke. It's so gross here.

Here are the highlights:

Tuesday - arrived home - you already read about that... mom had a Subway waiting in the cooler for me when we hopped in the car because I'm always starving when I fly in. Especially now since they yanked our pretzels from the plane. We drove home and sat around visiting the rest of the night and went to check out the new track at the high school...it was so nice to relax!

Wednesday - Heidi and her boys came out to spend the afternoon with me and of course she had to 'get my hair did'... I wish she could be my personal stylist out here. She knows my head of hair like the back of her hand and nobody else can do it like she does... even with the cowlicks... while she was at the house, Kelli and her youngest daughter showed up to say hello too - my arm hurt from holding her for all of 3 minutes! She does like to eat..ha ha..

That night we went to watch my nephew play his last home game of baseball. I was so proud of him - he has a mean little arm on him and made some really good throws and does an awesome job at first base. He got a couple hits and ended up on third base at least one of those times... I could have watched him a lot longer!

Since it was Zoe's birthday, we went over to my brother's house after the game for TACO PIZZA! You know Casey's has the best... oh man, it tasted SO good... my mouth is watering just thinking about it....mmmmm.... we had some ice cream cake afterwards and the folks took off and I spent the night with the kids 'camping' in the living room. I got to sleep with Zoe (because it was her birthday - do you see a theme here?) and she fell asleep in my arm with her head up on my shoulder - I wish I could have stayed like that forever.

Thursday - my brother and I dropped the kids off at their grandma's house and I went to his work so mom could then pick me up. We swung by the old office in Clive where I used to work to say hi to the guys and Pam and get caught up for a little bit. Once we left there, we did a little shopping and picked up Evonn from work to go to lunch with us. It was so nice having her all to ourselves :) After lunch mom and I dropped in to see Holly and April before they headed home for the day and then we headed back home... I was pooped out, seriously...

Friday - I was supposed to go to Ames to meet up with my college roommate, but with the flooding, all the roads were closed that I needed to take. I was so bummed out because I was looking forward to seeing her THEN! It just didn't work out that way though. Instead, dad got the Vette out and we went for a little spin around town, which made me soooo happy! I know I got my love for speed from him... in the evening, I met up with Jacie and got to spend some time together out to eat - which ended up being, not the two of us since quite a few people would come over to say hi or welcome back... but it was still fun! We went out to her parents' house to visit some more and so I could see the boys - man, have they changed! It was the first time I got to meet 'Wheel', so I was pretty excited to see him!

Saturday - My cousin, Kari and her puppy (who is not so little) Bella stopped by early in the morning to say hi on her way through town to her parent's house. I look at her and feel like I'm looking at me! Some people can really see the resemblance (like my mom) and other's can't (like my dad). I think we have a lot of the same mannerisms and facial expressions and it makes me laugh. For not being sisters, we sure look like it! After she took off, mom and I headed out to Shonda's and take her some of mom's freaking homemade peanut butter cups... I swear, she loves peanut butter and chocolate just as much (if not more) than I do....that's the only reason she ever wants me to visit in the first place. THEN, she put us to work ('us' meaning mom) in the horse barn. Shonda's the only person I know who can look sexy in a tank top, shorts, and cowboy boots.

My 15 year class reunion took place at the golf course starting at 2:30... let's preface this by saying that I'm not a golfer, I don't enjoy golfing, and it was hotter than the hubs of hell out there. After hole 3, I wanted to go home. I had fun with my golf partners though - Mark lives in Hawaii and we had fun catching up while driving the cart around and Amy and Jerry were our other teammates. We cheated so bad. But it was so much fun and totally worth the 2.5 hours in the sun!

Chad and April picked me up so we could head over to the second half of the reunion - supper at the lake. It was so yummy and fun seeing so many people! I think we had a pretty good turnout and I even won an award - lowest golf score. I don't know who tallied that considering we didn't really keep score and the score we had was a lie. Oh well...at least I got something :)

After part two of the festivities, the party moved to the local bar downtown... I can't hang like I used to. I was yawning and ready to go home at 11. I hitched a ride with Kelli and Ray to the bar and then had Karmyn drive me home after midnight. I was so tired and wished I had my own car so people didn't have to drive me everywhere!

Sunday - Father's Day (sorry dad, no mushy blog for you on Father's Day. Me being there was the best gift of all... I already know that...ha ha). We went to the 11am church service and I was pretty stoked to get to talk to Pr. Mike and his wife, Sally before it started. Both had some really encouraging words for me and I'm glad I had the opportunity to chat beforehand. Saw some friends afterwards and then headed back up to my brother's house for Zoe's (drum roll please) birthday party!! We played with her new dolls and 3D sidewalk chalk and had lunch and cake and opened gifts...what a day! Once we got home, we grabbed a bite to eat and then drove up to see my grandpa and wish him a happy Father's day as well while sitting outside visiting...it was just beautiful outside that night...

Monday - yay, the flood waters have receded so I could make it to Ames to see Amber! I had the best time with her...by the end of the day, we were giggling like we were 22 again :) I didn't want to go home... had lunch at Hickory Park and ran into my 'homey' while we were there - Mike stopped by our table to say hi and I was so surprised that he sat next to us the entire time and never said anything! It was so great seeing him... once we left there, we had to make a stop at the bookstore where I worked in college and say hi to my manager and get caught up on the hot happenings going on there... I miss that place... we walked around campus and then ended up driving out to our old apartment for memory's sake. Such a beautiful town...

Tuesday - Back to DM early in the morning to see April and her family before heading up to my dentist appointment - I can't believe what a happy baby that girl has! I never saw her stop smiling! ha ha...(she makes me smile just thinking about her.) I was lucky enough to meet up with Missy and her little guy for lunch AND have April come with us - it was such a relaxing afternoon walking around, talking, and shopping. Again, I didn't want the day with them to end. I miss Missy's stories and how she makes her facial expressions :)

Wednesday - Kind of bummed out this day because my friend Amy, my golf partner, was going to swing by with her girls, but one of them got sick in the night and couldn't come. I haven't seen them for a year and I was anxious to see how much they had grown! Those things happen though... I did get to go up to have lunch with mom while she was working and giggle around with Tawny while we ate together. They have the shortest lunch half hour ever! Once again, I headed back to DM and this time, went shopping with my sister in law for the afternoon. I rarely get to spend one on one time with her, so this was extra special for me! We picked up the kids and I got to have them with me on the way back to the house. They sang and recorded songs for my cell phone and I bet I've listened to them about 50 times a piece now. It's the only sound of their voice that I have and I have listened to them every night before falling asleep...

Hellooooo taco pizza for supper :) They know me too well... the kids and I went for a bike ride/walk around the block, Keegan and I played catch in the backyard and true to being my brother's son, he made fun of me for how I throw a baseball...and then kept mimicking it... over, and over, and over... acorn didn't fall too far from the tree there! Zoe and I blew bubbles, then we sat out on the patio and had some ice cream. Keegan asked me when I was moving back and then told me about all the things that he likes to do when I'm around.... it made me feel so good. When I asked Zoe what she missed about me being there, her reply was, "Ummmm...nothing." Great.... thanks for the kick in the teeth, kid. I spent the night again, but this time it was Keegan's turn to sleep with me on the air mattress! I got clotheslined in the middle of the night twice by his skinny little arm, kicked in the back, and when I woke up, the only room I had was the area in which I was laying on my side. He was snuggled up behind me with his head on my pillow just sawing logs. Glad he slept well!

Thursday - I cry every time I leave the kids when I spend the night. I hate good-byes. So, I bawled for a while, then picked up mom in DM in the morning. We did some shopping and had Evonn meet us again for lunch one last time. Got some groceries on the way home and just enjoyed the last night together relaxing and sitting around visiting.

Friday - Finished packing before heading back to CA and realized that I always have this feeling of 'doom' the day I leave. I get really quiet and don't want to talk. I think I was just going over the last week and a half and realizing how much I miss my family and my friends back home. My heart is in Iowa, but my home is in CA for now. ("Home" being used lightly of course...)

My body is in a slight detox after being there... I was fed so well - grilled out quite a bit, had homemade potato salad, chocolate pie, peanut butter cups, chips, omelets for breakfast, and anything else that I requested! Thanks, mama :)

Just think, six more months from tomorrow and it will be Christmas and I'll be doing the same thing all over again :)

I'll try to post pictures next time around...

The Arrival

2008-06-22T13:01:00.000-07:00

When I flew in to IA last week, I knew I was getting picked up from the airport by my parents. I was SO excited to finally land and when I made my way down to the baggage area, I was already searching the crowd to see their little faces standing where they usually do.

However, they weren't there. I panicked - how could they forget what time I get in? Is it possible that they're actually late for once in their lives?

I then see the side of my dad's little sparrow legs as I try to walk around a couple older ladies in front of me, but there is somebody else coming towards me. Now mom is smiling and waving and all of a sudden I hear, "MARCIE!!" and little feet come running my way... my niece and nephew were there to greet me, too!

Shocked and surprised are the only words that can describe that moment. Then the flood gates opened.

I picked up Keegan and he's got a death grip on my neck hugging me. I look down at Zoe and she has her hands in her pocket and she said, "I'm gonna be SIX tomorrow." I smile and say, "I know! I can't believe it!" I put Keegan down and pick up Zoe to give her a hug, too. Keegan says, "And I found a penny at Starbucks!" as he pulls out the coin to prove it. Zoe points out that I'm crying 'a lot' and I told her it was because I was so happy to see her - she let me know that she's not crying even though she's happy to see me too... ah, the honesty of kids...

Memoir

2008-06-08T09:02:00.000-07:00

There is a book out there called Not Quite What I Was Planning: Six Word Memoirs by Writers Famous and Obscure.

Last night at church, (is it just me or do I always seem to write this? Good thing I go there so I have something to write about!) our pastor was referencing this book and wanted us to think for a minute and write down our own memoir and then share it with the people around us.

A few examples that were given included:

I am the Lord Your God. (Leviticus 18:2) - God

Extremely responsible, secretly longed for spontaneity. - Sabra Jennings

A sake mom, not soccer mom. - Shawna Housman

I gave up too soon. - Anonymous

Taking a lifetime to grow up. -Mirona Iliescu

Most successful accomplishments based on spite. - Scott Birch

Cursed with cancer, blessed by friends. - Hannah Davies

Many mistakes but very few regrets. - Girl in congregation

Iowa native in California searching God. - Me

Of course I was obsessed the rest of the evening trying to think of more 6 word phrases to describe myself, but I was stuck on the one originally given.

What I came away with from the sermon on Leviticus was that God wants us to live and He wants what is best for us....He expects us to encounter His love, His compassionate holiness, and His ultimate plan and solution for us.

I guess I find a lot of comfort in those words - especially when things seem amiss at times.

It was interesting listening to others around me and what they had been through or are going through right now. We're all in the same boat together, but on different levels, it seems. Logical, sure... but sometimes we all feel like we're swimming alone, you know?

Think about it. What would be your 6-Word Memoir?

Post your comment here or email me directly and I'll anonymously do it for you :)

(My apologies to Mr. Nelson on the misprint...thanks for the correction!)

Road Trip

2008-05-31T21:48:00.000-07:00

This video was shot by Ryan (Rza) on the move out west last year.

He was my designated co-pilot, kept me company, and was in charge of video production!

I kind of forgot about some of the scenery - well, minus the train tracks since he took Amtrak back home - but seeing some of the run down towns and homes reminded me of the conversations that we had about what those people do for a living, where do they go to have fun, etc.

The 'rest area' made me laugh because I forgot about how scared I was to go in there - they had signs warning you not to leave the toilet seat up because of racoons coming up through the holes in them! Talk about having stage fright.

Thanks for putting this together, Rza! (And I guess thanks for making me stop in Salt Lake City at Wal-Mart to buy Modest Mouse - I thought you were going to punch me in the neck if I didn't actually stop so you could buy it on it's release date.)

Glad I did :)

Concert in the Park

2008-05-30T21:32:00.000-07:00

Tonight I went to a concert in the park and it was such a beautiful night to be out enjoying the cover band, Dam Road Closed.

I have forgotten how many things I used to do by myself and tonight was no different. I suppose some people would feel uncomfortable going out into public and sitting alone. However, I'm not going to lie and say that I wasn't somewhat shy about heading in front of this massive crowd to take a seat, but I did it. I kept telling myself that I drove across the country to (essentially) live by myself; listening to music alone is the 'easy' part!

My little blue lawnchair and I pulled up to a spot on the outskirts of the crowd behind a family of 6, plus their little dog. Everybody had picnic baskets, there was some food for sale on the street, and train rides going around the park.

I think I'm a closet-people-watcher. Normally I don't like staring at people when they walk by (because I know people are watching me walk by and it creeps me out), but tonight I totally enjoyed it! I got some friendly smiles, some hello's, and was able to pet most dog that roamed by eating leftovers off the ground.

I always wonder how people met each, if they're happy, where did they come from, and thoughts of this nature...some people looked bored out of their mind, others were dancing and singing with the band. There was a young dad there with his son, who was probably about 6, and he looked disgusted the entire time. The kid was running ALL over the place and the dad wouldn't even try to find him. Maybe he knew he'd come back, I don't know, but it made me wonder what kind of relationship they had between one another.

The smells reminded me of tailgating up at ISU...that bbq smoke blowing over the crowd, people were talking and laughing and just having a good time. What I did find kind of funny was the fact that where we would have beer/kegs/cases, most of the people were drinking wine and some of the bubbly goods. You can tell you're in a different part of the country when folks are walking around with actual wine glasses filled with their favorite red or white wine and not cans of Bud Light!

Oh and I love watching little kids dance - it makes me laugh out loud and I literally had tears in my eyes watching this girl next to me, who was probably 3. She would pull her shorts from the bottom of the legs WAY up, so you could see her little undies and then she would turn around away from her mom and shake her little booty... oh my gosh, it was the funniest thing! I totally would have taken a picture, but I didn't want her mom to think I was some lunatic.

I watched a big dog and it's owner walk in front of me and while she was talking to somebody, the dog was eating cheese out of a bowl that some people had sitting next to their wine glasses on a tiny table. I didn't have the heart to tell the guy not to eat it after watching the dog drop a piece back in the bowl. I silently laughed though.

Maybe I'm getting back on track and putting myself out in situations that I haven't faced on my own for a while. It felt good to be out and about on this beautiful summer night.... but I also know deep down that I want to have a picnic and take my own family to a concert in the park some day, too.

Some day.

Memorial Day

2008-05-25T18:50:00.000-07:00

Today is a day of remembrance and one that always hits my heart in a profound way.

When we were in high school, the band always had to play a Memorial Day service at our home town cemetary. I can't say as though I thoroughly enjoyed waking up early to play the Iowa Corn Song, but I always felt sentimental looking out into the crowd of veterans who would come pay their repsects.

I played the trumpet and became the regualr TAPS player at funerals and let me tell you, I can't hear that song and not get tears in my eyes... one fundamental song that speaks volumes to so many people. I remember hiding behind a tombstone at a man's funeral playing TAPS and crying at the same time - not an easy feat, but knowing the family was there to hear me and say their last good-byes made a world of difference.

Every year the legion would have a ceremonial flag burning and I would have to play at their event as well. I never fully understood how much the American flag meant until I watched the men carefully place those old, tattered, and faded flags into the big, metal barrel and salute each one. It brings about a whole new perspective on our freedom and the men and women who are still fighting for us thousands of miles away.

Memorial Day is also a day that my parents go around to cemetaries and place flowers on the graves of loved ones. On the occasions that I would go with them, it was a nice time to reflect on the family and friends that were in our lives and what they meant to us.

Yesterday at church, the pastor was talking about the legacy that people leave behind - what sort of legacy do you want people to remember about you?

Celebrating this day means remembrance, bbq's, fun, friends, and family - I hope you each take time out to remember the people in your life and how much they mean to you....tell somebody that you love them... and to my friends and family, I love you.

Goodbyes

2008-05-24T20:17:00.000-07:00

First and foremost, thank you to all of you that lifted me up in prayers after my last posting. I can't even begin to tell you how everything changed within the next day! I was so touched by the swarm of emails that filled up my inbox and the phone calls that followed... THANK YOU!

Yesterday I had to say good bye to my little car pool buddy from work. I was sad.

We rode to work together for almost 7 months and became to know and learn about one another, and sit next to each other in our little cubes. He made fun of me when telling stories...for example, when I would say, "Mom called last night." His reply would be, "Our mom or YOUR mom?" I guess I was supposed to say 'My mom called me last night.' Or he thought it was funny to say, "Hey is mom giving us pop for supper tonight?" Oh, you funny guy...He made a big deal about taco pizza and thought it sounded like the worst meal ever....same with tator tot casserole - until I made it and he liked it!

He was the little brother that I never had and made me listen to music that I would never listen to and a morning sports radio talk show that I became addicted to hearing every day.

I'm all about chasing dreams and grabbing opportunities that present themselves and that's exactly what he's doing... I'm so proud of my little friend!

He's off to become an umpire in a midwest league/division after attending umpire school in FL back in January. This is his dream job - how cool would it be if we could all do what we had dreamed of doing as a child? I'm so happy for him and will miss his laugh and the way he would say, 'Uh...hey, man' in his fake southern accent. Kid had a big heart and I'm fortunate enough to have become his friend within the first week of working at our company.

Showing off the skills

Good luck, Ice - I'll miss ya!

Warfare

2008-05-19T19:29:00.001-07:00

Funny how things change after a little bitty post...

I have to admit that I am being shaken right now...there is some sort of spiritual warfare going on in my heart and I don't like it one bit.

Over the weekend I started reading a new book that is giving me quite a few "A-HA!" moments - like how to recognize that feeling of suppression that comes on our hearts when we ask God for a change. I want to change. I want to denounce the ugly feelings of desolation that keeps rearing it's ugly head and telling me that I'm not 'good enough' or that I'm all 'alone' when really, I know deep down that I'm not.

This whole breaking up thing is for the birds. I hate becoming attached to somebody just to have them leave. (Granted, this break-up was pretty mutual for the most part.)

I'm tired of having this pit in my stomach and emotions going all over the board trying to tell me that I'm ok with it, or that I'm in a better place, or that he just wasn't 'the one', and it's alright to remain friends. Is it really??

This is the first time in my life that I have tried this 'friend' thing with somebody and there are days where I like it and some days (like today) that I don't. I shouldn't look at him and want to burst out crying (I'm visualizing cartoons where their mouths are open really wide and tears are squirting out like a sprinkler..). But then again, I feel like I appreciate him more now than when I did when we were in a relationship...why or how is that even possible?

He was my family. He was my friend. He was the one that I turned to for everything this past year. And now he's going to the place that I called home for 32 years without me so he can work for the next couple of days. I wanted to take him there to meet MY family, to meet MY friends, and show him where I was raised. I guess there is a little bit of jealousy going on or something.

I really wanted this to work with him, but it didn't and sometimes it's hard to move on. Especially when you have PMS.

Now that I completely got off the subject, my book is talking about how we are able to take on others' feelings and anguish through that little gnarly demon that is oh, so cunning. We may be trying to help and really praying for people that have asked us to step in and pray for them - so we do.

The author was trying to get at how we need to counsel God first and ask Him what we need to be praying for that particular individual because He may just want us to give it all over to Him and not try to make that other person 'feel' better because we can't do it all... so what happens is that we start internalizing their problems and empathizing over the top with them. The devil starts to see this as a maybe a weakness of our own and then swoops in to really tear us apart.

Hence, my spiritual warfare.

I have a couple of very close people in my life going through some really crappy things and being so far away and not exactly able to 'help', I'm beginning to feel this weight that they are also carrying.

It's that tightness in your throat, the heaviness on your chest, and the urge to cry at the drop of a hat. Check, got it. This is why I think that I'm also being attacked by these break up feelings all over again... I was doing fine (seriously, maybe a little too fine), then some jerk of a spirit told me that I wasn't going to be able to find anybody who would love me again and that I would end up being all alone anyway. Liar.

To all of you reading this, please lift your little CA Girl up in a word of prayer - I don't see my bible study group anymore because we're taking the summer off and this is where they would come in. I need YOU to help me through this - I need to let go of these feelings that I'm still holding on to with the ex boyfriend... I want to turn my thoughts away from what could have been, what did I do wrong, why didn't it truly work out, does he still think about me, would we ever get back together, blah blah blah to more meaningful thoughts on what lies ahead and what is in store for me.

I believe it's going to be good... I really do. I just need help getting through this muck for now.

Not Shaken...but Stirred

2008-05-16T19:47:00.000-07:00

Something is going on inside of me. Not sure what it is, but it's a feeling that I can't quite explain.

It reminds me of when I got the 'confirmation' that I was supposed to move westward - it's a combination of excitement, anxiousness, nervousness - but in a good way.

I think God is stirring some things inside of my heart and I'm so exctied to see what it is! I have to remind myself about God and the timing in which He answers our prayers - yes, no, or wait - lucky me, I'm waiting. (sigh)

Aside from that, today was possibly one of the most stressful days that I've had at a job - you know the kind of day where you just want to get up, take your car keys, and walk out? Nobody would know where you went, you were just gone. Toodles. I have always been so good about letting things roll off my back when it comes to my job, but seriously...this took the cake. All is good now that I'm home and got to talk to my good friend on the phone...always puts things into perspective for me!

And can I just let you know how excited I am to be going home in a couple of weeks? What is it with me and WAITING?! I hate waiting. I just want to be there already - seeing my friends, hugging my niece and nephew, talking to my family - oh, and eating a good meal! My mouth waters when I smell somebody grilling at the complex...mmmm....

As much frustration that comes of these 'stirred' up feelings, I know it's all good and the reward will be great!

Happy Birthday!

2008-05-13T21:08:00.000-07:00

Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday to you,
Happy Birthday dear Windy Lindy,
Happy Birthday to you! :)

I hope you have a great birthday, mom! Too bad I can't be there to split a tasty treat from DQ with you...I love you bunches and will see you in a few weeks! WEE HOO!

Again, happy birthday!

How funny (and fitting) is this picture? Isn't the frosting supposed to be 'drizzled'? Bwaaa ha ha ha!

Happy Mother's Day...take two...

2008-05-10T20:30:00.000-07:00

Happy Mother's Day, Hot Mama!

I would do (just about) anything to be with you to celebrate today! At least I'll be with you soon and you know I'm always thinking of you :)

A year has gone by and you've done nothing but shown your continual support, love, and affirmation in all that has been thrown my way while we've been apart. Thank you for sharing my tears, laughter, and stories over the phone, email, and through cards and letters.

I could never have asked for a better mom - you have given advice, counsel, and heartfelt understanding in ways that I wonder if I could do in return... you are an inspiration, a role model, a caregiver, and comedian... you are my true Frother :)

You are the perfect example of what sort of mother, wife, and woman that I want to be - you are the backbone of the family, you have faithfulness that will be rewarded, and an outpouring of love towards every person you meet.

As I have watched you over the years, I see so much of Grandma Ar in you and a smile comes to my face (like right now)! What a true embodiment of how love radiates in a humanly form... the stories that you tell of her and the 14 years of memories that I've kept of my own, show how you have continued her legacy of sorts... thank you for being a great example!

I hope you have a great day, mom, and always know that you're on my heart and being loved and thought about daily! Happy Mother's Day - I heart You

Your Sweet Baboo

Girl Time

2008-05-06T17:58:00.000-07:00

This past weekend was such great 'girl time' with an old friend from home - ahh...good times :)

Kelli flew in on Friday afternoon to San Francisco and drove over to my place to meet up and hang out with me for the weekend. We had such a great time together and I began to remember why I have always liked her - she is caring, she is a great listener, she is super intelligent, funny, loving, and just easy to get along with... I loved hearing stories about her kids, husband, and her life in general.

We 'met' when we were 3 years old when her grandpa and grandma lived next door to me. (If you remember me talking about Lyle and Kate in previous blogs, this is their granddaughter). I loved it when I would see their 'hot' van pull into the driveway because I knew that we would get to play outside - even though mom and dad would have to 'remind' me that she was there to see her grandma and grandpa and not ME - after all, we did get to see each other at school every day!

The afternoon started off with lots of chatting, reminiscing, and laughing followed by supper at my favorite place across the street - it was a celebration of sorts, so a pazookie was in order! Great food and great company, who can beat that?

She had spent 40 hours awake by the time we decided to call it a night and head to bed! I don't know how she did it... maybe it's because she's a mom and can easily run on fumes, I don't know? :)

Saturday we decided to head down south to a couple wineries (even though we don't drink wine) and scope out a few places - it was beautiful weather and so nice to be outside enjoying the sun with one another. We had a bite to eat and headed off to another winery before heading back up to my place and relax for a while. The drive was really scenic and peaceful (even though she thinks I ran over a rattlesnake on the road) and it was such a nice backdrop for a day of friendship. I could have stayed there for hours...

That night, my friend Jason came over to go out for supper with us and then head to the drive in movies to see Baby Mama...(Woo WOO!). I think she had the excitement that I did when I first went there, but I don't want to speak for her - I still get excited going there! Once he dropped us off, we stayed up until 1am talking some more (I mean seriously, what more can we talk about?!)

Sunday morning we headed off to church and it was so much fun to be able to share my church home with her. On our way out she said, "How can people know that this place is here and not want to attend?" I thought the sermon was great and the music was all acapella that day... something they have never done before. And just for the record, her singing did not sound like a dead jellybean ;) ha ha ha... (I believe I told her than at a very, very young age in music class!)

After church, we headed downtown to Old Sac for some souvenirs for her kids and look around at the sights. There was a Cinco de Mayo celebration going on that was fun to watch, but I think our day was catching up to us and we decided to head out. However, we had to wait 40 minutes just to get out of the parking ramp (well, if you ask her, it was an hour and a half!) and by then, my nerves were just about shot! We headed back here and grabbed a bite to eat and then she started the sad process or repacking so she could head home in the morning. Boo.

Monday morning was the day I was dreading because I knew my little apartment would be empty again - I miss the smell of her perfume, her hugs, her laugh, and just having a best friend to share my time.

Kelli, thanks so much for taking time out of your busy schedule to come see me, comfort me, and love me. Thanks to your husband for taking care of the three little ones and home and knowing when a friend was in need - I appreciate you more than you know or more than words will be able to express. I love you and thank you so much! I'll see you next month, my 30 year friend :)

Pet Peeves

2008-04-26T13:05:00.000-07:00

When I was in the shower this morning, I got to giggling about random things that bother me.... nothing major, but you know how things can irritate you and it just makes you grit your teeth or roll your eyes? Like, why do people DO the things they DO?!

Well, here are just a few of my pet peeves...

The sound of fingernails being clipped - gross.

When people leave their turn signals on when they're going around the loop to get on/off the interstate...um, hello, i know you're going left - we're all behind you in a semi-circle...

Going to a public restroom where numerous stalls are available and somebody sits RIGHT next to me. This usually happens at work with me and then I can't go because they're invading my privacy.

Toothpaste left in the sink - and yes, I'm the one leaving it, but when I'm in a hurry to get to work, I don't think about washing it down. Then when I get home, there it is - all crusty - to greet me.

I don't like it when people tell me what kind of a mood I'm in when really, I'm just thinking or concentrating on something. For example, 'Wow, you look really ticked off or upset' - no, that's just my face.

Hair in the bathtub drain. (Again, all me, but still a pet peeve!)

People who don't hold the door open for somebody older than they are... R-E-S-P-E-C-T...

Getting cut off in the grocery store checkout line.

Let me know what YOUR pet peeves are - just so I know I'm not the only crazy one!

Beaming

2008-04-16T18:05:00.000-07:00

I have been so proud the last couple of days - proud of my 8 year old nephew and his newest accomplishment. I want to show off just a little bit....

His artwork was featured at an art gallery north of DM and I hear that there were only a couple other 2nd graders who had art displayed, as well. He drew the most perfect butterfly made up of vibrant colors with the sun as his backdrop! I love it and am so proud of him :)

Great job, Keegs - I can't wait to see it in person in a couple of months! I love you!

Changes

2008-04-13T13:48:00.000-07:00

This past week has been about changes taking place, being grateful about the lessons learned, and the many experiences that I've had this past year. It's funny how life can hand you all sorts of twists not knowing what's around the corner, but expecting yourself to 'be ready' when things do change.

I have been filled up with grace for the past few days and it's an absolutely great feeling. (Ironically, when I went to church, the sermon was about grace!)

Grace is undeserved favor. I think we're all in need of some grace every now and then!

Grace apprehended always brings us life changes - it helps us to live in freedom and to live in gratitude.

Grace equals gratitude. It's so simple!

I'm grateful for the seasons of change, the people that come and go in my life, and the emotions and feelings that can get caught up in it all. As much as I admittedly hate change, sometimes I need to embrace it and work through those tough areas to get to the desired outcome.

I honestly feel 'free' again... I'm hoping to be able to get back to where I was in life when I moved west over a year ago. Finally rid myself of these ugly insecurities that decide to surface at the most inopportune times. Learn to be content and not take everybody's opinions straight to heart. Welcome future changes... the list could go on and on...

I am so very blessed and grateful for the friends and family that I have in my life - thank you for your words of encouragement and endless love this past week! I couldn't have asked for better peeps to be in my life :)

'Nuff Said

2008-04-09T12:40:00.000-07:00

Oh no...

2008-04-05T19:49:00.000-07:00

It's happening.... I'm turning into my mother.

I remember calling my mom one afternoon to tell her that I was so upset with myself for "randomly clapping" my hands like she does. For instance, if she is cooking and trying to remember an ingredient and then walks over to get it -clap clap- I think it's just a habit, but the time I found myself doing it, I slapped my own hands.

Well, my latest mom-characteristic is something that I've been trying to ignore, but I can't do it any longer. She can crack open the newspaper and fall asleep within three minutes. We used to tease her and say, "Oh, you're going to 'read' now?? We'll wake you up in a half hour."

"Oh you guys, I'm not tired, I really want to know what's going on in the world," she would say....and then she would be out like a light...zzzzzzz....

Well, the last two nights I've tried to read a book and find myself counting the holes in my eyelids. I never used to do that!? Of course, it doesn't help that I just ate supper and have my little blue buddy (the heating pad) on my back keeping me nice and warm. (I'm so good with justifying any situation.) When in all reality, I'm becoming my mother.

Which, by the way, isn't a bad thing. After all, she is the funny one.

The Wait is Over

2008-04-03T17:33:00.000-07:00

The teenie bopper within me is screaming with joy - I have waited 14 years for this very moment:

THE NEW KIDS ON THE BLOCK ARE REUNITING!!! omg...this is so awesome...

Back in the day, my friends and I were retarded over this group. My walls were slathered with BOP! and Teen Beat magazine pictures from one end to the other. I had t-shirts, lapel pins on my jean jacket, a hat (which glowed in the dark), VHS tapes of their videos and concerts, their cassette tapes, and posters galore. I memorized dance moves by taping MTV and practicing over and over in the living room. We went and saw them perform at the Iowa State Fair with Tiffany and Tommy Page as the opening acts - I was GOING to marry Donny Wahlberg - oh, my heart is all a flutter just thinking about it all...ahhhhhh....

We had it planned out - Heidi was going to marry Jordan, I was going to marry Donny, Hilary was going to marry Jonathan, and Amy - well, we teased her about marrying Danny. Joey was 'too young' for us at the time, but he had potential...

I think about how obsessed I was with this group and how much money I pumped into them - along with every other young girl who was in love with them, too! They were soooo dreamy...

So in case you're wondering what to get me for my birthday in August, they do have a new album coming out :)

Girl Power

2008-04-02T19:18:00.000-07:00

I did it. I bit the bullet and bought a new car over the weekend.

I had a bit of buyer's remorse at first, but the longer the week has been going, the happier I'm becoming with my new purchase!

One of my friends told me that I probably felt like I've abandoned the "little black jewel" that brought me out here and I think they're right... I didn't get a chance to say good-bye to the Grand Am, take a picture, or hug the seat. The sales guy drove it away - off to auction, more than likely - and I didn't even get to keep one of my license plates. I was sad - there, I said it.

The sales guys were sort of making fun of people who get an emotional attachment to their cars and I didn't know it at the time, but I definitely had one. I took care of 'her' when she got beat up out here, I had her paid off, loved cleaning it, and I still thought it was a sharp car. I remember the night that I saw it on the lot at the car dealership and told my folks that that was the car I had 'always wanted'....and it treated me right in return.

Now parked in the garage is a new Dodge Avenger R/T - it's the Charger's "little brother". I feel safer driving it and don't constantly worry about how I'm going to get up the big hill to work every day without it spitting and sputtering or breaking down along the highway. The air conditioner doesn't take 15 minutes to kick on, the sunroof doesn't sound like it's going to fly off when it's being opened, and the engine doesn't die when I pull into a spot to park! All in all, I think I've made the right decision...

Owweee....

2008-03-31T19:25:00.000-07:00

So I haven't been able to shake this cough/cold that I've had for the last month and it's becoming pretty frustrating. Last night I was having yet another coughing fit (you know, it always seems like as soon as you lay your head on your pillow, it decides to flare up) when all of a sudden, I coughed twice really hard and instantly had pain in my side. Well, after a visit to the doctor this afternoon for my third dose of antibiotics and now some cough syrup (YAY!), he told me that I have a cracked rib.

I don't think I've experienced a pain like this and I can't imagine people that have had to deal with multiple broken ribs, but this is no fun. The pain is around my pectoral area/armpit on my left side and permeates back to my shoulder blade. It hurts to cough, sneeze, blow my nose, laugh, or pretty move my arm....I hear it's a bit of a process to heal and I know that it hurts to lay on my back and oh, my side too... boy, I can't wait for bed tonight! (sarcasm)

Ouchie.

Happy Easter

2008-03-23T15:33:00.000-07:00

Seems just like yesterday that I was talking of my first Easter away...ho hum...

I was so excited to wear white pants to church today - I bought a new hot pink shirt a while back and couldn't wait to get dressed up for service - cheesy, I know, but that's just me :) I love seeing everybody in their pastels and florals for this time of year!

I was fortunate enough to have my 'other' Iowa friends join me for service today and that made me feel so good - they're like family in a sense and had moved here about two weeks after I did last year.

The pastor spoke a great sermon, which I have billed the 'reminder' sermon for myself. It reminds me of why Jesus died for me, reminds me of how thankful I am, and reminds me that sometimes I am guilty of being a Doubting Thomas. Drives me nuts at times, but I'm just being honest. We go through hardships and wonder why God would do this to us, etc., but I think God puts us through those things for our own good. He doesn't leave us even though we think that He does... (guilty again)...

After service, my friends invited me to their house for brunch and an Easter egg hunt with their kids, which was hilarious! By the time I left, they were so jazzed up on sugar that I think I left at the right time :)

The weather is perfect - sunny, highs around 75 and just beautiful - it's a glorious Easter if I do say so myself! I hope you enjoyed your time with your family and friends....

It's My Anniversary!

2008-03-18T18:50:00.000-07:00

It's hard to believe, but one year ago today, I said good-bye to my home - the most familiar thing in my life - in pursuit of a dream... a dream that had a lot of uncertainty and a sense of excitement all rolled into one!

Feels like I've done a lot of reminiscing the last couple of weeks about what I was 'doing' a year ago. I'm definitely a 'date' person - I can remember things that are so random because of the date, but the year might be a different story. I think I get this trait from my mom because she is a walking archive of information...our own little Cliff Claven :)

When I think about this time last year, I have to admit, I get a little sentimental for a number of reasons. First of all, my friends threw the best going away party for me ever... I sat and looked around the room at all of the faces that I have grown to love and thought of the endless memories that we had created together. A sense of sadness swept over me knowing that I was pushing aside these friendships to do something for myself - and I felt very selfish about it. I mean, what would these people do without me?!?

I have always been close to all of the action - meeting up for drinks or dinner with friends after work, being able to run home for the weekend to see my folks, having my brother and his family close by so I could spend a Sunday afternoon with them. I was leaving all of this behind for what? I have never felt more loved and appreciated than I did when I was with my friends and family and that feeling will never go away. Things change and people change... but we'll still have each other no matter the distance or time change!

The day before I drove away is so vivid to me... I was in my hometown saying my last good-byes to my family and friends and sharing a lot of tears. I drove back to DM and at the time, I was living with Chad and April and had finished loading the car and sat down for a minute to take it all in....the three of us were sitting in the living room and April told me that they had 'lied' to me. My stomach turned and my heart sunk - I had no idea what was going on, but she smiled and told me that I was the first person to know that they were expecting! She had found out a few days earlier that she was pregnant... we hugged, we cried, we laughed at ourselves for hugging and crying :) (I think I had asked if she were pregnant earlier, but that's when she told me 'no' - liar!) At that moment, I realized how many events I was going to be missing by being so far away... and it ripped me apart.

After a sleepless night, I was up and ready to go at 7:30am - more hugs, more crying with Chad and April - and that was it. I backed out of the driveway looking at my childhood friend and my second brother while tears streamed down my face as April and Maverick were waving good-bye to me.

Luckily, I had to pick up my co-pilot, Ryan, and I knew I needed to get straightened up before I got to his place! He met me out front with his tiny little duffle bag, looked at me and said, "Rough morning, huh?" No make up could hide crying eyes!

And away we went... 10 hours of driving the first day, 10 hours the second day, and 4 hours the third day... I was so wiped out from being behind the wheel that I was ready to turn around and head back to Iowa!

We saw some of the most gorgeous scenery in Utah and Nevada, marveled at how high gas prices were climbing the further west we drove, wondered about these little secluded towns along the way and how people survive and what do they do for fun...we had great conversations and counted down the hours until we got here!

What a difference a year makes. I feel like I have been put through the wringer here, but in a good way. It hasn't exactly been an 'easy' year, but some things aren't supposed to be easy from this short conclusion that I'm coming to. I can't even begin to tell you all of the things that I am learning about myself... what I'm like separated from the groups I had always been a part of, how my emotions have changed and evolved, how I've seen what a strong person I've become, and the weaknesses that I still need to work on in the upcoming year. God has been refining me in countless ways - ways that I didn't even know needed refined in the first place!

What is ironic about my thought process is that I assumed I was coming out here to make a difference in somebody else's life... Like, God was going to use me as a tool to help someone and I was eager to see what I was going to get out of it... well, joke's on me... He's ripped me apart from the inside out and taken all of these ugly things that I thought were 'cured' and has me working some more on them...it's humbling to say the least.

I realize now that I wouldn't have been able to go through so much of this 'stuff' if I were still living in my old surroundings.. I wouldn't have listened to God and would continue to think that I was 'perfect' and didn't need anything to change about me. I liked me then, but I like me a little bit more now....

There really isn't a day that goes by that I don't think about my family and friends and wonder what they're doing. I miss my mom's hugs, the smell of my dad's cologne, watching my brother playing with his kids, my sister in laws homemade egg rolls, and the uniqueness of each friend that I have... I couldn't have done any of this without your support, motivational talks, and prayers... thank you!

I have met wonderful people here, I've seen a ton of new things, experienced life on a whole new level, and I'm looking forward to the next year and what's in store for me! God is so good to me and like the saying goes, everything happens for a reason....My reasons are becoming more prominent and each day I'm thankful to wake up knowing that God's got my six - (Apes, that one's for you!)

Happy Anniversary to me - I made it a whole year! =)

Air Show

2008-03-17T20:47:00.000-07:00

Yesterday afternoon we went to this air show at a local air field and it was amazing! I have never been to a show like this before and I was blown away - literally!

The wind was brutal and of course, being the nervous Nelly that I am, I was so scared that the planes were going to crash into a fiery inferno right in front of my eyes...but no fear, it was spectacular!

There were all sorts of planes out on display from those old time bombers, Black Hawk heliocopters, the Top Gun jets, and the UPS planes... there was something for everybody! My favorites were the 4 planes that had smoke coming out the back so they were making strips in the sky and of course, the featured headline of the show was the Navy's Blue Angels.... I can't even tell you how cool it is to see these 6 jets flying back and forth in formation...A-MA-ZING...

The sound was defeaning at times, there was a lot of excitement built up in the crowd and obviously, everybody was there to see the Blue Angels and boy did they put on a show! There was an instance where four of the jets were coming towards the crowd the other two were out of sight, but not for long as they buzzed the crowd from behind! I am guilty of screaming and ducking down because I completely thought they were crashing (do you see a theme with my fears?!)

Oh man, this was so much fun and I'm totally glad I got to see it and share a few pictures with you!

The City

2008-03-06T18:16:00.000-08:00

Last weekend my dear little friend, Kerry, was in town and it was so wonderful seeing somebody from home!

I had fun chatting, laughing, and sight seeing - it almost felt weird showing her where I live only because I don't know a lot of history about places, how old the trees are, and things like that...we had to make a stop at Jamba Juice first and foremost, toured Old Sac for the afternoon, and had a bite of sushi for supper. Saturday morning we headed to San Francisco and did all sorts of touristy things like a double decker bus tour over the Golden Gate Bridge, rode the cable car, and took a ferry out to Alcatraz. It was so much fun and very much needed... friends like her are rare and I'm so thankful that she's been in my life for the last five years!

Here are a few pictures from the weekend in San Francisco:

Double Decker Bus Tour

Golden Gate Bridge lookoutM&K Market (Get it? Marcie & Kerry)

Lazy Sea Lions at Pier 39

Ferry Ride out to the Golden Gate Bridge

Cable Car ride

Coit Tower and city from Lombard Street (the windiest street in town)

Loue u?

I want my Mommy...

2008-02-19T17:30:00.000-08:00

I hate being sick. Well, I don't know too many people that like being sick, but just to set the record straight, I'm not a big fan.

I actually got sent home from work today because I sit outside of my manager's office and he was tired of hearing me coughing, sneezing, and blowing my nose... I've got crackly ears, a scratchy throat, and now a nose that's been rubbed raw from Kleenex... I want my mom.

Sniff, cough, cough...

Jellies

2008-02-11T19:57:00.000-08:00

Today I stopped in to Target to kill some time over my lunch hour and I was happy to see that Jellie Shoes have made a comeback!

Lucky (or unlucky) for me, I still have to wear a size 2 children shoe and they had soooo many colors for me to choose from in case I had some major lapse in judgement.

When I was a kid, I had a light pink pair that I wore until they fell apart and the little piece of plastic would jab the bank of my heel and rub it raw. You would think that if they were made of 'jelly' that you wouldn't have that problem...

How about when your feet would be so sweaty that when you'd take off to run in them, they'd fly off like a rocket behind you because hello, jelly...no traction on the inside. So now that your feet are sweaty, you're shoeless, and you're running in dirt, you've now made mud pies under your feet. So in order to get the bottom of your foot clean, you would wipe it on the inside of your calf....awesome, matching muddy foot prints on each calf!

How in the world did these things come full circle?

(I'm going back tomorrow to buy the hot pink pair.)

Spring Tease

2008-02-06T17:46:00.000-08:00

Ooooh, I'm so excited!

I think spring is around the corner here, but I don't want to jump the gun, either. The grass is getting greener, I heard some birds for the first time since fall, and the buds are coming out on the trees... I love these new beginnings and seeing things come to life in front of my eyes!

Home...

2008-01-31T19:22:00.000-08:00

Your prayers have been answered and our Kate was called home this morning around 7:20am ... how happy she must be dancing and laughing in heaven! God promises a new body when we enter His gates and there is no doubt that she is free of Alzheimer's and has been reunited with her loved ones and friends from long ago.

Thank you for being a wonderful neighbor, surrogate grandmother, and a loving friend.

I will miss you, Kate and will love you always....

Prayer Warriors....Activate!

2008-01-29T17:18:00.000-08:00

Ok everybody... my blog seems to cover the masses of family, friends, coworkers, and everybody in between.... your prayers are needed now....

First of all, my uncle is going in for open heart surgery tomorrow... I just pray for knowledgeable doctors, patience to the family while he's in the operating room, low amounts of stress and anxiety, and a quick recovery on his part. I'm sure it's scary as ever and I can't even begin to imagine what he's going through mentally right now... (and I thought having my wisdom teeth pulled was bad.)

Second, please pray for Kate (note the Alzheimer's blog a few months back) - mom emailed me and said that she had a stroke early this morning - not much news on that front yet, but hopefully in the morning we'll know a little more as to how she's coping. First the alzheimer's, then a broken hip, and now this...she has had a rough year and so has the family - especially her husband, Lyle. God we ask that you will please continue to provide strength to Kate and to her family and close friends....

Third, my friend Pam has asked for prayers for family struggles with cancer/hospice, depression, and now a suicide attempt. She asked that the words she speaks to her family are directly from God and not her own...Pam has flourished in her faith these past few years and her passion for God is true and real... I just pray that her words will be echoed in the ears of those who need and thirst to hear it.

Thanks, everybody - with love and blessings... Marse

The Wheel of Why

2008-01-23T19:05:00.000-08:00

Last week I attended my very first small group at my new church and it was great! Jason and I started going to this new place about 3 or 4 weeks ago and I liked it from the beginning. Of course, I seemed to have liked all the places we've checked out (with the exception of one) and I decided it was time to get connected with some fellow women!

Luckily, I got online and found a bible study on the book of Ruth, emailed the facilitator and showed up the next day to meet my new group! There were 9 women in my small group, each with their own experiences, stories, and lives to share and it's amazing how well we all mesh together. One girl is a few years younger than myself, but otherwise, everybody is between the early to mid 40's up to age 65.

If you're not familiar with Ruth and what her role is in the bible, take a quick read - it's only 4 short chapters, but chocked full of life's lessons. Ruth teaches us about integrity and righteousness and the providential work of God in our lives. Fabo.

Last night, the pastor, who is in her late 40's and a complete riot (think of a comedian teaching bible lessons - she makes Numbers funny!!) talked about what Ruth shows us just in the first chapter. She shows us our own struggles with God and the 'plan' that He has for us - we ALL have our struggles, but can't always think of the 'plan' right at that point...Naomi, Ruth's mother in law, gives us the ok to point out that feeling that way is NORMAL....to blame somebody....to be mad and upset with the circumstances that are given to us. They don't always seem fair, but God always knows how our story is going to end - I struggle with that at times and this is where the wheel of 'why' comes up.

Libby (the pastor) pointed out how you can stick a hamster in its little wheel and it will run around and around and around and around until complete exhaustion. We do that too, but our wheel is made up of 'why's' - why me? why this? why that? why did that happen? Sometimes we need to be pulled off of our wheel of why and ask 'how'? How can I make this better? How can my problem be solved? How can I pray for this situation?

I've been knocked off of my wheel of why (or summoned from my pity party) by people I love - who can see the struggles that I go through and know that it's not healthy to continually be upset or worry over nothing and I thank you for that... in John 15:13, it states 'Greater love has no one than this, that he lay down his life for his friends'. How true. A friend will be honest, but in a loving way, and we will STILL be friends with them! I've got friends that I will call or email to ask a question or opinion, wanting an honest answer, and I'll get it - it may not be what I wanted to hear, but they're doing it because they love me.

Ruth mirrors for us a deep devotion - 'where you go, I will go' - telling her mother in law that she would be willing to lose everything to be with her. This really hit home for me because I know I'm a selfish person - I try not to be, but I really I am. Philippians 2:4 states 'Each of you should not look only to your own interests, but also to the interests of others.' I realized that I get upset if something doesn't go my way or it isn't what I wanted to do - I act like a hormonal 16 year old trapped in a 33 year old body. Why is that?

I just want to be refined into a person who puts other people first, who can admit when I'm wrong, who can love no matter the circumstances, and be honest - which, as you can see, I'm showing some raw honesty now! HA! If you are on your own wheel of why right now, step off and start asking 'how' - these words have resonated through my mind all day and if I could ask one thing of you; please pray for me - that my heart would be open and willing to take the changes.

Walking With Dinonsaurs

2008-01-09T17:33:00.000-08:00

I had the opportunity to experience something new and fun Sunday night at Arco Arena (where the Sacramento Kings NBA team plays).

Jason bought tickets for an exhibition called 'Walking With Dinosaurs' and it was amazing. I wasn't sure what to expect when I went there, but for two hours, I was enthralled with what my eyes were seeing.

Blood would go to those spikey things to deter preditors

New Vegetation

Technical Term: Longneckosaurus

There was a guy (I thought of him as a circus ring master) who portrayed a paleontologist. He narrated the whole show and talked about how big the dinosaurs were, what they ate, the changes in the earth, etc. It was very kid friendly and informational for all who were listening - sure, there was the occasional bloody murder scream coming from a small child when the dinosaur would 'look' at the crowd, but it was still fun!

So these dinosaurs were almost to scale and they were 'driven' by people in small car contraptions between their feet. The car was made to look like a rock and you couldn't see the people inside unless you looked hard enough, but to think of how much skill they had to have to drive these things and run it's legs, mouth, and blink its eyes just amazed me.

The smaller dinosaurs had people inside of them, so all you could see were their legs sticking out at the bottom, but they made it all look so realistic! Even the rocks (which portrayed continents) had people inside of them and moved them around the floor to represent the earth moving into the continents we know today. Inside of those rocks, were the 'vegetation' that would sprout out... it was seriously, SO COOL!

Vegetation

Dino Poo

T-Rex defending baby

T-Rex and baby t-rex re-united

The dinosaurs were loud and you could hear their roars, listen to them eat, the thundering of their feet when they would walk....everything was so well put together; I could have stayed another two hours!

Extinction

(Sorry that the pictures are blurry, but we weren't supposed to use a flash)

Rain, Rain, Go Away...

2008-01-04T17:53:00.000-08:00

Today was my first glimpse of a hard, winter storm that passed through northern California.

It all started last night with heavy rain and then the wind picked up. The combination was just torrential...the kind of rain and wind where it passes by in sheets and makes the pavement look like it's moving.

When I got up this morning, the wind was howling through the fireplace, doorways, and window sills mimicking the sounds of a cat meowing. I can't even describe the wind - it was fierce and the rain stung your skin when it hit. Talk about a bad hair day...

There were 100 year old trees uprooted from the ground, flooding on streets, pools of mud in backyards, and the little creeks that you didn't know existed were overflowing like raging rivers. I think the most amazing thing that I saw was watching a power line snap in half driving parallel with the road.

As I was looking off into the distance, a bright blue light caught my eye and there was the initial thought of 'who would be setting off a flare in the rain?', then it dawned on me that it was the power line. The line was dancing with blue sparks and waves of electricity which reminded me of watching a heart machine track a heart beat. At the end of the wire was a ball of fire that hit the ground and started a streak of fire... it was so weird to be seeing fire while it was raining. My next thought was of the 6 or so head of cattle that stood in a line, in the water, next to the downed power line hoping they weren't going to turn into all beef patties right in front of my eyes!

When I left work, there was a huge pool of water that I had to get through in order to get on the highway, but I followed a car close enough that they made the wake for me to get through just fine! By the time I got home 10 minutes later, it had let up quite a bit and now it's just raining lightly and not as windy as it had been. There is SO much damage and clean up that will need to take place in the upcoming days. Luckily, we still have power and didn't have that much happen at the apartment complex.

I'm not sure if I'd rather have THIS or ice and snow to deal with?!

I lied.

I'll take this - at least I didn't have to wear mittens today...

Toof

2008-01-04T17:06:00.000-08:00

It finally happened!

Happy New Year!

2008-01-01T16:56:00.000-08:00

Hard to believe another year has breezed by, huh? I guess it's weny by quickly for me because of all of the changes that have taken place in the last 9 or 10 months!? New sights to see, new job, new friends... I guess this is a good time to reflect on everything that has taken place in my life and give thanks to how blessed I have been in all areas of living and the people that grace my life on a daily basis. So, thanks to you =)

I was able to fly home over Christmas and spend time with my family and friends and it was wonderful. (Cold, but wonderful!) It's amazing how quickly kids grow and change, isn't it? My nephew seemed to have stretched up and my niece is losing her first tooth...how fun!

My days were spent with a revolving door of friends coming in and out of mom and dad's house and spending some time in DM with others....time flies when you're getting caught up on lives from the last 4-5 months since my last visit! I got to see new babies, beautiful pregnant friends, family that I hadn't seen for possibly a year in some cases, and friends that know and love me. I feel so rejuvinated when I visit and realize how much each of you mean to me. (Sorry to sound so sappy, but I'm just being honest!) I just had a great time, that's all!

It was fun to be home and fun to come back to Cali....so hard to believe that the weather is so different just a couple states away, you know? Fortunately, the snow wasn't too bad while I was there and I was able to fly in and out with no problems... However, I had to sit next to creepy creeperton on my way to my layover - he had a HUGE booger hanging out of his nose, popped in some DVD with naked ladies, and coughed on me the entire flight. For those of you who are unaware of my germaphobe tendencies, I wanted to stick my head out my window and breathe some fresh air so bad - or spray Lysol in his general direction. Darn restrictions on aerosols anyway.

Hopefully you had a great New Year's Eve and an even better '08 that lies ahead... my resolution is to keep my blog up better... hee hee....

Peace out.

Lagging...

2007-12-17T09:47:00.000-08:00

So sorry that I've been MIA for the last month... I hope to get something of interest out to you all before long, though...that means YOU, little Miss Portland :)

I do know that I'm very excited to get back home to celebrate Christmas with my family and see old friends again and meet some new babies... it will be a great trip, for sure!

Looking forward to seeing you all and for those of you that I won't be able to see in person, I hope you have a wonderful Christmas with your families and friends, as well!

Steelers Rule

2007-11-12T16:47:00.000-08:00

Lucky Girl

2007-11-07T19:07:00.000-08:00

A few months back, Jason bought us tickets to go see Maroon5 in concert at Arco Arena (where the NBA team the Sacramento Kings play their home games)...and let me tell you, it was fabo!

Opening acts were Phantom Planet (friends of Maroon5 from L.A.) and The Hives (a group from Sweden). Phantom Planet had a small set up on stage since they were sharing with The Hives, so they didn't have too much room to run around, but they were really energetic.

Then, The Hives came out - I thought the lead singer was a crackpot from the way he was probing the crowd for cheers...like, he was doing the Hulk Hogan hand wave up to his ear - you know what I'm talking about? I was a little annoyed, but there was something about them that I dug. Maybe it was the fact that they all had on black suits with fat black and white striped ties? By the time they were done with their set, I was totally digging on them...the lead singer was SO energetic and just got the crowd absolutely pumped up! It was so much fun watching them...

Ta-da....then the big guns came out... I love Maroon5! Adam Levine = Meow...

Besides the fact that the tallest man in Sacramento County was sitting in front of me [thanks, J for trading seats so I could see :) ] that band never slowed down! I looooved it...the music rocked, the lighting was cool, and the stage had a slight walkway out into the crowd... I love live concerts! Too bad I wasn't able to hear much the next day, but it was well worth it :)

Thanks for the tickets, Jase - I had a great time!

Star Struck

2007-10-28T20:20:00.000-07:00

Being the little Iowa hay seed that I am, I haven't had the opportunity to meet too many 'celebrities' in my life, but today I had that chance....well, sorta.

Ok, to any other person on the street, he wouldn't be considered well known, but in the Christian music circuit, he's kind of a big deal. His name is Lincoln Brewster and turn your radio to any Christian station and you're sure to hear a few of his songs being played.

Lincoln heads up the worship ministry at Bayside Church in Granite Bay where I attend services and this afternoon they held a Halloween based theme called 'Trunk or Treat'. Basically, a bunch of people donated a half a million pieces of candy (sucks to be that person counting) and then others volunteered to decorate their cars and put candy in the trunk so kids could have a safe place to collect the goods. They had all sorts of games and jumpy houses for entertainment and a ton of food, which reminded me a bit of a midway at the fair... it was a good time!

Anyway, we were walking through the crowd and I spotted Lincoln and asked for a picture (sorry Todd, no autographs), which he kindly said yes to... deep down inside I was squealing like I did when I saw the New Kids On The Block in concert back in the day, but I think I played it off pretty well.

Here's me and my new BFF, Lincoln...

Memory Walk for Kate

2007-10-07T08:02:00.000-07:00

Yesterday was a beautiful fall morning in Sacramento - cool, crisp, and sunny! Leaves are starting to turn colors and fall from the trees and it was a great day for reflection....as my friend, John V. quotes, "Another leaf has fallen" (i.e., another day has passed by!)

My friend/coworker, Kim, and I have been planning to walk in the Alzheimer's Memory Walk in memory of Kim's late grandmother, Concetta, and in honor of my neighbor grandmother, Kate. I was so excited to have the opportunity to participate 'in honor' of somebody. I think Kate would think it was pretty cool that I did something for her since she is the one who has done so much for everybody in her many years here. What a surreal thing - seeing ALL of these people who have been effected in one way or another by Alzheimer's.

Marcie & Kim at the finish line

Walking up to the finish line

Kate and Lyle have been our next door neighbors for many, many years and they have taken me in as one of their own 'granddaughters' since I was a little girl. I would get so excited to see Lyle's green pickup turn the corner around supper time so I could hollar at him through the kitchen window or give a little wave if it was too cold to open it up. I loved the days when mom would have off from work and Kate would invite us over to their house for coffee and cookies.

This couple has showered me with love, hugs, kisses, and attention throughout my life and I am forever grateful for each of them. When I would lay out in the backyard, Lyle would sneak around the side of the house with his water hose and spray me down when I least expected it. Well, little did he know that I was ready one day when he thought he was being a Sneaky Pete - I soaked him and his bib overalls with our own hose and once he took off, I ran around the other way and got him with the water bottle (this is obviously before Super Soakers or he would have really gotten it!)

Lyle & Marcie

Now Kate was all about work ethic - Lyle is too, don't get me wrong, but Kate would put me to work if I told her that I was 'bored'. (Yeah, you would think that I would learn my lesson and stop saying it around her, but I'm not that smart.)

Anyway, I can remember sitting on their back step snapping green beans (and hating life) wishing my mom would tell me to come home. Never happened - I think it was a ploy on both parts - mom wanted me out of the house and her hair and Kate didn't want to snap the five gallon bucket by herself. We would have great conversations about her life when she was young and she would always make me feel important by asking questions about me, school, and whatever else I wanted to talk about. I would get in trouble for eating too many peas out of the pod when helping her (again), she would have me water her flowers, pick raspberries off of the bush, and help her pick up sticks in the yard. Seriously, worst job ever...

However, Kate made a mean batch of chocolate chip cookies and had the best laugh ever - straight from the belly and full of life! Lyle and Kate were great dancers and I loved watching them glide around the dance floor holding each other, smiling, and being surrounded by their friends and loved ones. I remember asking Lyle not long ago how they stayed married for the last 68 years and he told me one of his secrets is to not dwell on the last argument or falling out because it won't do any good to keep dredging it up - just move on, don't go to bed mad at one another, and alway agree with what the woman says! :)

These two people have been an inspiration to me on so many levels - they would walk with Todd and I to church and Sunday school (when we felt like going) and let us sit with them after class was over. They have never missed sending me a birthday card to let me know that they were thinking of me, they attended school functions that Kim, Kelli, and Kerry were also involved with, but somehow would make me feel like they were there just for me! They were at the door for me to tell me about the passing of my great grandma Ar when my parents weren't able to be there and they held me while I cried. They have attended the annual backyard parties since they began seven years ago, and have always made me feel special in every way that grandparents do!

Needless to say, when Kate came over to tell us that she had 'that Alzheimer's thing' a few years ago, we were all quite shocked. How could this be? This is Kate - vibrant, full of life, loves her husband, kids, grandkids, and great grandkids more than anybody I know - what will happen? Will she remember me? When will we know that she really, really has it?

I tell you what - this is an ugly disease. The Kate that I knew and grew up with isn't there anymore... luckily for her, Lyle kept her at home for as long as he could and did so much for her before having to take her to the nursing home so she could get the proper care she needed. What a tough decision it was for him and the whole family and we can only imagine how hard it would be. He visits her every evening, has a little cup of ice cream, holds her hand, and leaves at the same time every night. Unconditional love, I'm telling you...

Before I moved to California, I wanted to go tell Kate that I would be moving away and that was the hardest ten minutes that I had. She did not know who I was, but wanted me to take her with me! I knew it was going to be hard, but you can never really prepare yourself enough. Her daughter, Joyce, had flown in from Ohio and Lyle was there before Joyce was flying home, so we sort of overlapped our visits.

I watched Lyle set her down in her chair, help her blow her nose, and give her a kiss goodbye. Joyce, bless her heart, has been back to Iowa to visit many times throughout the last couple of years to visit her mom, keep Lyle company, and help out along with her brother, Duane, and his whole family who live there. To see a family ban together is an amazing thing to witness and even though it would be easy to give up and say that ''she wouldn't know if I am there or not'' is not an option for them. Their faith has helped to hold them up, their friends, and extended family have let it be known how much Lyle and Kate mean to them in their own special ways and this is why I write.

This family has meant the world to me and I wanted to let you know that a little 3 mile walk to support the Alzheimer's effort isn't going to bring her awareness back, but I had a great time walking FOR Kate and thinking about how much she has meant to me and always will.

Lyle and family: I love each of you so much and will continue to pray for Kate and your own strength through this process. I know you each have your own special memories of her as I do, too. When I think about her, a smile comes to my face and always will. I am glad God has given me the opportunity to have neighbor grandparents like you and again, I'll be forever grateful for each of you. Thank you for treating me like your own granddaughter and loving me - I love you both so much!

Marcie & Kate

A Break from the Sun

2007-10-05T19:29:00.000-07:00

You know how God always has a way of letting you know that He's not too far away from you?

Well, today was no different for me than any other, but I do know how God speaks to me and it's definitely through nature.

I absolutely LOVE sunsets (too hard to get up for sunrises, but I'm sure I'd love them equally) and anything that has to deal with the sun or water - not so much Gray's Lake sort of water, but I'm thinking about the ocean because of it's infinity...there's definitely more than meets the eye when you gaze out over a large mass of water.

Anyway, often times I will sit outside at lunch and just stare up in to the sky, or watch the golden grass sway in the breeze on top of the hills, and feel a calmness. To me, that's God placing His gentle hand on my back and letting me know that things will be ok - that, daughter, I'm right here with you... so needless to say, I pay close attention to what is going on outside to 'see' any signs that God might have for me that day! Maybe that's why I was such a freak about the weather when I was little.

Who am I kidding; I still get scared and want to wet my pants when there is a tornado warning.

For those of you that know me, you knew one of the reasons that I wanted to move to CA was because of the sun. OH, how I loooove the sun! Who knew that you could get tired of the fireball in the sky and endless days of warm weather?

During the summer, it felt like the movie, 'Groundhog Day' because every day (I'm serious, EVERY day), the daily forecast read 'High 88F and Abundant Sun.' I was so sick of the sun. I just wanted clouds - seriously, God, can you put a few cotton balls in the sky for me? I miss variety - I miss the changing of the seasons - I miss the smell of rain - I miss clouds - I miss the shadows that clouds cast on the landscape - I WANT A CLOUDY DAY!!

Well, friends, today I got my clouds - it was beautiful! Cool, cloudy, rainy, and windy - great weather for Friday Night Football. Who wants a bowl of chili? Some hot chocolate? Oooh, me - I do, I do! Just when I thought God was getting all boring on me and forgetting about what I like (because sometimes it is all about me), I see this lovely sight on the way home.

Thank you, God, for not forgetting about me and letting me know that when I start to second guess these decisions in my life, that it doesn't matter because You are always there with me. I needed a rainbow today and you gave me TWO!!

Just because I liked it...

2007-09-27T15:15:00.000-07:00

The Day I Met Daniel, it was an unusually cold day for the month of May. Spring had arrived and everything was alive with color. But a cold front from the north had brought winter’s chill back to Indiana. I sat with two friends in the picture window of a quaint restaurant just off the corner of the town square. The food and the company were both especially good that day. As we talked, my attention was drawn outside, across the street. There, walking into town, was a man who appeared to be carrying all his worldly goods on his back. He was carrying a well-worn sign that read, “I will work for food.”

My heart sank. I brought him to the attention of my friends and noticed that others around us had stopped eating to focus on him. Heads moved in a mixture of sadness and disbelief. We continued with our meal, but his image lingered in my mind. We finished our meal and went our separate ways. I had errands to do and quickly set out to accomplish them. I glanced toward the town square, looking somewhat half-heartedly for the strange visitor. I was fearful, knowing that seeing him again would call for some response. I drove through town and saw nothing of him. I made some purchases at a store and got back in my car. Deep within me, the Spirit of God kept speaking to me: “Don’t go back to the office until you’ve at least driven once more around the square.” And so, with some hesitancy, I headed back into town. As I turned the square’s third corner, I saw him. He was standing on the steps of the stone-front church, going through his sack.

I stopped and looked, feeling both compelled to speak to him, yet wanting to drive on. The empty parking space on the corner seemed to be a sign from God: an invitation to park. I pulled in, got out and approached the town’s newest visitor. “Looking for the pastor?” I asked. “Not really,” he replied, “Just resting.” “Have you eaten today?” “Oh, I ate something early this morning.” “Would you like to have lunch with me? “ Do you have some work I could do for you?” “No work,” I replied. “I commute here to work from the city, but I would like to take you to lunch.” “Sure,” he replied with a smile. As he began to gather his things, I asked some surface questions. “Where you headed?” “St. Louis.” “Where you from?” “Oh, all over; mostly Florida.” “How long you been walking?” “Fourteen years,” came the reply.

I knew I had met someone unusual. We sat across from each other in the same restaurant I had left only minutes earlier. His hair was long and straight, and he had a neatly trimmed dark beard. His skin was deeply tanned, and his face was weathered slightly beyond his 38 years. His eyes were dark yet clear, and he spoke with an eloquence and articulation that was startling. He removed his jacket to reveal a bright red T-shirt that said, “Jesus is The Never Ending Story.” Then Daniel’s story began to unfold.

He had seen rough times early in life. He’d made some wrong choices and reaped the consequences. Fourteen years earlier, while backpacking across the country, he had stopped on the beach in Daytona. He tried to hire on with some men who were putting up a large tent and some equipment. A concert, he thought. He was hired, but the tent would not house a concert but revival services, and in those services he saw life more clearly. He gave his life over to God. “Nothing’s been the same since,” he said, “I felt the Lord telling me to keep walking, and so I did, some 14 years now.” “Ever think of stopping?” I asked. “Oh, once in a while, when it seems to get the best of me. But God has given me this calling. I give out Bibles. That’s what’s in my sack. I work to buy food and Bibles, and I give them out when His Spirit leads.”
I sat amazed. My homeless friend was not homeless. He was on a mission and lived this way by choice.

The question burned inside for a moment and then I asked: “What’s it like?” “What?” “To walk into a town carrying all your things on your back and to show your sign?” “Oh, it was humiliating at first. People would stare and make comments. Once someone tossed a piece of half-eaten bread and made a gesture that certainly didn’t make me feel welcome. But then it became humbling to realize that God was using me to touch lives and change people’s concepts of other folks like me.” My concept was changing, too.

We finished our dessert and gathered his things. Just outside the door, he paused. He turned to me and said, “Come ye blessed of my Father and inherit the kingdom I’ve prepared for you. For when I was hungry you gave me food, when I was thirsty you gave me drink, a stranger and you took me in.” I felt as if we were on holy ground. “Could you use another Bible?” I asked. He said he preferred a certain translation. It traveled well and was not too heavy. It was also his personal favorite. “I’ve read through it 14 times,” he said. “I’m not sure we’ve got one of those, but let’s stop by our church and see.” I was able to find my new friend a Bible that would do well, and he seemed very grateful.

“Where you headed from here?” I asked. “Well, I found this little map on the back of this amusement park coupon.” “Are you hoping to hire on there for a while?” “No, I just figure I should go there. I figure someone under that star right there needs a Bible, so that’s where I’m going next.” He smiled, and the warmth of his spirit radiated the sincerity of his mission. I drove him back to the town square where we’d met two hours earlier, and as we drove, it started raining. We parked and unloaded his things. “Would you sign my autograph book?” he asked. “I like to keep messages from folks I meet.” I wrote in his little book that his commitment to his calling had touched my life. I encouraged him to stay strong. And I left him with a verse of scripture, Jeremiah 29:11: “I know the plans I have for you,” declared the Lord, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you. Plans to give you a future and a hope.”

“Thanks, man,” he said. “I know we just met and we’re really just strangers, but I love you.” “I know,” I said, “I love you, too.” “The Lord is good.” “Yes. He is. How long has it been since someone hugged you?” I asked. “A long time,” he replied. And so on the busy street corner in the drizzling rain, my new friend and I embraced, and I felt deep inside that I had been changed. He put his things on his back, smiled his winning smile and said, “See you in the New Jerusalem.” “I’ll be there!” was my reply.

He began his journey again. He headed away with his sign dangling from his bed roll and pack of Bibles. He stopped, turned and said, “When you see something that makes you think of me, will you pray for me?” “You bet,” I shouted back, “God bless.” “God bless.” And that was the last I saw of him.

Late that evening as I left my office, the wind blew strong. The cold front had settled hard upon the town. I bundled up and hurried to my car. As I sat back and reached for the emergency brake, I saw them....a pair of well-worn brown work gloves neatly laid over the length of the handle. I picked them up and thought of my friend and wondered if his hands would stay warm that night without them. I remembered his words: “If you see something that makes you think of me, will you pray for me?” Today his gloves lie on my desk in my office. They help me to see the world and its people in a new way, and they help me remember those two hours with my unique friend and to pray for his ministry.

“See you in the New Jerusalem,” he said. Yes, Daniel, I know I will....